The World's Stupidity Awards are in!
In 2003 a Canadian Albert Nerenberg began the World's Stupidity Awards. His reason was "we're all stupid, some of us just need to have it pointed out," and to recongnize achievement in ignorance and stupidity.
I personally would like to offer the Bush Administration my congratulations.
So, in the spirit of stupidity, who do you think should receive the award?
STUPIDEST MAN OF THE YEAR
1) Donald Thompson - District Judge - a.k.a. Oklahoma Penis Pump Judge.
The judge operated a powerful penis pump underneath his robes during at least three trials while court was in session (two of which were murder trials). Convicted June 29, 2006 on four counts of felony indecent exposure.
2) Michael Brown - former director of FEMA
3) Kim Jong Il - North Korean dictator
4) Mahmoud Ahmadinejad - President of Iran
5) Dick Cheney - Vice President of the United States
STUPIDEST STATEMENT OF THE YEAR
1) "No fruit loops!" Ex-Dictator Saddam Hussein on his breakfast of choice while in jail.
2) "They think work is a four-letter word." - Senator Hillary Clinton, speaking about kids today.
3) "I think they're in the last throes, if you will, of the insurgency." - Vice President Dick Cheney, on Iraq.
4) "What do you think you're looking at, sugar tits?" Mel Gibson to female Sergeant in Malibu, California following his arrest for drunk driving.
5) "My family and I are deeply sorry for all that Vice President Cheney and his family have had to go through this past week," Harry Whittington, after Dick Cheney shot him in the face. February 17, 2006
THE DUMBEST MOMENT OF THE YEAR
1) Zinedine Zidane head butts Marco Materazzi in the World Cup final and is ejected.
2) Vice President Dick Cheney shoots friend
3) Britney Spears speeds with her baby's head close to steering wheel
4) Danish Newspaper Jyllands-Posten publishes the controversial Mohammed cartoons
5) Protesters violently demonstrate against the Danish Mohammed cartoons
STUPIDITY AWARD FOR MAKING A STUPID SITUATION STUPIDER
1) Mel Gibson offering to urinate on the floor following his arrest for drunk driving.
2) Britney Spears almost dropping her baby after driving dangerously with him twice, and then talking about it on TV
3) Nick Flynn trips on his shoelaces, falls down a set of stairs and smashes three priceless antique Chinese vases
in a museum. Flynn then criticized the museum for not taking better care of its displays.
4) The Bush Administration in Iraq
5) Deciding not to tell anyone after Vice President Dick Cheney shoots his friend.
DISINFORMATION STUPIDITY AWARD FOR BEING MOST
OUT OF TOUCH WITH REALITY
1) Senator Hillary Clinton
2) Michael Jackson
3) US President George W. Bush
4) Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, President of Iran
5) Tom Cruise
STUPIDEST MOVIE OF THE YEAR
1) Basic Instinct 2
2) The Da Vinci Code
3) The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift
4) Hostel
5) Little Man
MEDIA OUTLET WHICH HAS BEST FURTHERED IGNORANCE
1) Danish Newspaper, Jyllands-Posten
2) The Name Radio Format (Bob, Jack, Tom etc...)
3) Fox News
4) The Colbert Report
5) Rush Limbaugh
STUPIDITY AWARD FOR RECKLESS ENDANGERMENT OF THE PLANET
1) The Government of North Korea
2) The Government of Israel and Hezbollah (Shared)
3) Iran
4) The Arms Industry
5) The Petroleum Industry
STUPIDEST STATEMENT BY PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH
1) "I'm the decider, and I decide what is best."
2) "Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job." - to FEMA director Michael Brown in a televised address.
3) "Peter. Are you going to ask that question with shades on?" to legally blind reporter Peter Wallsten. Bush later apologized, saying he was unaware of Wallsten's blindness, and that while he likes to needle the press, "next time I'll use a different needle."
4) "Wow! Brazil is big." George W. Bush, after being shown a map of Brazil by Brazilian president Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva.
5) "It's in our country's interests to find those who would do harm to us and get them out of harm's way."
STUPIDEST TREND OF THE YEAR
1) WW III
2) Post Reality TV Reality TV
4) Killing people for God
5) Killing people
6) Ass Cleavage
LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD FOR STUPIDITY
The Middle East
Disclaimer: I know this is not news but, it's raining cats and dogs here and I need a little levity.