Reprinted from The Satirical Political Report
http://satiricalpolitical.com
In what all decent folks are condemning as the most vile, cynical and self-centered act in memory, "INDEPENDENT"-Democrat Joe Lieberman has just published a book entitled: 'IF I DID IT (Join the GOP)'.
Appearing on FOX News to promote the book, Lieberman described -- in strictly hypothetical terms, of course -- the fatal wounds that would be inflicted on the Democrats if he stabbed them in the back and joined the GOP ranks.
Such a massacre would include ceding Iraq policy back to Bush, having two more years of right-wing judicial appointments, and enough waterboarding to clean all the blood off O.J.'s Bronco.
To dramatize his threat, Lieberman stood up in the middle of his FOX appearance and struggled to put on a blue blazer -- that was clearly two sizes too small for him -- exclaiming: "it just doesn't fit, I may have to quit."
However, some Democrats suspect that Lieberman may have already made the commitment to go Republican, since the Capitol police who searched his offices found fibers from both John McCain, and Congressional pages.
To try to prevent Lieberman from abandoning ship, the Democrats plan to track all of his movements with a CNN helicopter, and an armada of D.C. taxicabs.
Moreover, as their ultimate leverage over Lieberman, Senate Dems are threatening to reveal that Lieberman has frequently used the "N" word -- NEO-CON!