Well, we can chop Howie Dean from this whole "election" thing:
In an interview with the AP, Dean said he had known since he was in high school that he had an unfused vertebra, a condition called spondylolysis.
Dean tried to spell the condition during the interview, but got it wrong after three tries, even though he is a medical doctor and worked as an internist before entering politics.
God save us! America owes a debt of thanks to AP writer Nedra Pickler, who has saved us all the dreadful fate of a presidential candidate who can't even spell spondylolysis.
You know, I attended a Dean speech several months ago, and I'm loath to admit that at the time I was moved by a lot he had to say. Of course, in my defense, that was before I knew he was a semi-literate who couldn't even spell common American language words like spondylolysis.
Anyway, I called up AP reporter Nedra Pickler to congratulate him or her on their superb journalism:
"Hello Nedra," I said.
"Hi J. Nelson," Nedra replied, "I trust you're calling about my S-P-O-N-D-Y-L-O-L-Y-S-I-S article for the AP. Well, I felt I owed it to the dozens of Americans suffering from Q-U-A-N-T-O-L-I-T-S-H-O-U-L-I-N-I-O-U-S disorder or P-E-N-Y-L-I-M-A-X-S-Y-S-I-O-I-O-U-I-S to expose a candidate who didn't even care about their suffering."
Case closed. I would like to officially change my official endorsement from Howard "SPonyelknrgfgjngarf" Dean to spelling bee champion An-Hoa Giang, who can spell spondylolysis, desiccation, stochastic and probably balance the budget before you get to S-P-o.
By the way, you know who else shouldn't be elected president? Microsoft Word. As I'm writing this "spondylolysis" keeps getting the squiggly red line of dissaproval. Hey Word, I know how to spell spondylolysis, ok? I'm not some Howard Dean. Fucking Christ.