I’m not a frequent diarist, but I have a situation I’d like to ask my fellow Kossacks about.
Some acquaintances of mine have invited me to a special party. I’m not comfortable going, and I’m not sure exactly why.
This acquaintance’s name is Paul. I know he is former Army and served in Iraq. We have not had very much political discussion, but he knows I’m a liberal who hates George Bush because I generally have a large sign espousing said hatred in my front window – "Rescue America: Impeach" is a good example. I suspect he is much more conservative than me and may even vote Republican. The few times we danced around discussion of the war, however, he did not have good things to say about Bush. Mostly what I remember him saying was that if the cause was so important, we should have gone in with many more troops, and that the whole situation is now a big clusterfuck.
Anyway, he has a buddy who is returning to the States from Iraq in 3 weeks. He will spend a week in Germany before coming here, and Paul wants to show this guy a great time. "We gotta throw a kickass party," says Paul, and I’m sure this will involve a lot of beer, cigarettes and weed - which is all fine with me. Normally, I’d show up early and leave late.
What’s bothering me is this: I’m not sure I want to party balls-to-the-wall with someone who is only a few weeks out of Iraq, mainly out of some weird sense of compassion toward him.
I fear he will be uncomfortable, not yet grounded, not yet "decompressed." Will he look around at our drunk, stoned and undoubtedly inane conversation and think, "THIS is what I’ve been fighting to ‘protect’?" What if he sits in a corner by himself all night, not wanting to talk, not remembering how to connect?
Even worse, what if he is of the "Yeah, we SMOKED those fuckin’ towelheads! " mentality?
In the end, since it’s all about ME <snark>, I’m sure it all boils down to the question of whether I will be uncomfortable being around him, or to my discomfort with the unknown of how this person will feel and behave. I certainly do NOT want to get into a political discourse with the returning soldier, regardless of his position, and I’m not sure how to avoid that.
Any thoughts or advice would be helpful and appreciated. Please be nice.