Lucky undeserving natives! AP reports "Granite Bankruptcy Deal Lets the Pacific Island Nation of Palau Keep U.N. Diplomat."
Judge Allan L. Gropper of the U.S. Bankruptcy Court in Manhattan on Friday approved Granite's settlement of a lawsuit filed by Twentieth Century Fox. As part of its deal with Fox, Granite also will pay its former president Stuart Beck $2 million, allowing the TV executive-turned-diplomat to continue to serve as Palau's representative to the U.N.
So, how's about it Colbert? H.E. Mr. Stuart Beck, Ambassador Extraordinary and Plenipotentiary/Permanent Representative (dang! that title has got to be longer than the island! and that's after abbreviating "His Excellency") deserves to come back on to update you and the rest of America.
We need to "Meet An Ally, Again"
Under Beck, Palau has been a staunch U.S. ally. Last August, Beck wrote a letter to the New York Times urging the U.S. to keep John Bolton as its ambassador to the U.N. Bolton resigned in December.
It was a close call for the natives who almost lost their trusted Ambassador.
The 60-year-old Beck, who left Granite in 2005, said the company owed him $3.1 million, money he was depending on for his retirement. He said he would be forced to give up his U.N. position if Granite, which filed for bankruptcy in December, didn't pay him in full.
What with fielding embassies in a few key countries Palau had only $1 left to maintain a United Nations presence.
Palau, a nation of 300 islands and about 20,000 people, is southeast of the Philippines, at the western edge of the Caroline Islands chain. The country pays Beck, who lives in New York and is married to a Palauan, a nominal $1 a year to represent its interests at the U.N.
Tips to His Excellency on a Do-Over appearance:
- Brush up on Palauan Language Skills;
- Wear a necklace made from genuine Palauan endangered sea turtle shell;
- Reveal secret identity as "born and bred in the islands" Palauan;
- Confirm that heretofore supposed identity as co-founder and former president of now bankrupt tv broadcasting company was actually a CIA cover illegally outed by a jealous colleague who couldn't keep his own UN gig.
C'Mon! Do-Over, Colbert!