I think I have road rage. Or at least road annoyance. But it could easily grow into the real deal.
I'm not the only one. Road rage is spreading like the monkey-borne virus from "28 Days Later." And not without reason – people just don't seem to know how to drive unless its in a manner that imposes the maximum amount of inconvenience upon other drivers. Anyone who’s taken 45 minutes to cover three miles knows exactly what I’m talking about.
I'm not trying to sound like an over-aggressive butthead, here. I'm no speeder, and I don't think I take undue risks. I always wear my seatbelt, and have been the bane of every child and teenager who has ever ridden with me by refusing to even shift out of neutral before they are wearing theirs. So it's not about trying to be Speed Racer. It's about getting yourself from Point A to Point B in the quickest, most efficient manner possible within the bounds of safety, and creating an environment where others can do the same. Here's what I'm thinking:
- Stopping to let people into a line of traffic is probably a bad idea. I know people think they’re being helpful, but they’re not. That’s because of two things. First, there’s probably people BEHIND them, and when they stop to let that one car go they're more than likely inconveniencing a whole bunch of other people. That just makes no sense. Second, the person they’re letting go doesn’t necessarily know that’s what they’re doing. Most of the time when someone slows down to let me in, by the time it’s clear that that’s actually what they’re doing, it would have been quicker if they’d just passed by.
- Everyone should strive to watch what's going on more than, say, ten feet in front of them. When someone’s stopped to make a left turn 50 or 100 feet up ahead, there should be more than enough time to pass around them on the left (assuming there’s enough space and it's safe to do so). There’s no excuse for coming to a screeching halt right behind the person as though they just materialized out of nowhere. It’s called paying attention, and not enough people do it.
- Once someone has started making a turn, they have to follow through. If they realize after they’ve slowed down, turned on the blinker (assuming they did – but that’s another rant), and begun turning the wheel that they’re taking the wrong turn, tough. They are now committed to the turn. The people coming up behind them don’t realize that it’s the next road they want, and don’t expect them to lurch abruptly back into the line of traffic. Instead, they should complete the turn, find somewhere to turn around, and go where they meant to go in the first place.
- The damn turn signals are there for a reason. Why do so many people guard their intended course changes like a state secret?
- When the light turns green, it's time to GO. It’s easy to remember, because "go" and "green" both start with the letter G. It's not time to futz with the radio. It's not time for checking oneself in the mirror. It's time to GO. And when the light’s red and everyone's waiting, it's wise be prepared for it to change. Most people act like it’s a freaking surprise. "Oh, my stars, look, it changed! Whatever shall I do?" It’s gonna change – that's what it does. Even when I’m four or five cars back, when that light changes I’m good to go.
- Whatever is going on at the side of the road is almost certainly not relevant to anyone else passing by. Whether it's a fender bender or a guy in an IROC-Z pulled over by a cop or road construction, it's not worth gawking at. Once it's clear that it is safe to proceed, then proceeding is what should happen. The vast majority of the time there’s nothing going on, there’s probably nothing most passers-by could do even if there was, and the cop isn’t going to suddenly drop what he’s doing to chase down someone for going 37 in a 35 zone. As long as there’s not a body lying in the street blocking the way (or some other rare and extreme situation), the best thing most of us can do is just move along and clear the area.
- If people are not going to drive FAST, then they should get out of the FAST lane. In fact, that’s why they named it the FAST lane to begin with. I'm not talking about unsafe speed; but to my thinking, in normal conditions the traffic in the fast lane should be moving at the maximum posted limit. Hint: if there’s people passing you on the left, you’re going too slow.
- If someone's looking for an address or something, or otherwise just dawdling along looking at the foliage or whatever, then they should at least have the courtesy to pull over from time to time to let people who actually have to be places at specific times (like, for example, anyone with a job) to pass. People expect to drive at the speed limit (again, assuming normal conditions), not 10 mph under.
- Finally, there's the cell phones. Personally, I don’t have any specific beef with people talking on them most of the time, unless it interferes in any way with the safe maintenance of their forward momentum. I do believe that dialing the phone while driving is unwise, but just talking? It seems to me that anyone who can't hold a conversation and operate a motor vehicle at the same time shouldn’t even be allowed to talk to live people sitting next to them in the car, much less on the phone.
There's a lot of good reasons to improve the flow of traffic on our roads. Simple civility and a general reduction of daily stress come to mind. There's also the potential savings in fuel costs that could be realized by reducing or eliminating delays (of course, much greater savings could be realized by driving more fuel-efficient cars, car pooling, and using more public transportation – but that's another diary entirely!). Government can help – reducing the proliferation of unnecessary stop signs and traffic lights might be a good place to start (but again, that's a diary unto itself). But I really think a lot of progress could be made if we all just made a little effort to drive not just defensively, but responsibly, safely, and efficiently as well.