I watched Tony Snow on Hardball again yesterday, defending the White House's support of Alberto Gonzalez yet again and denigrating our Democratic leaders for having the unmitigated gall to demand testimony under oath from the likes of Karl Rove and Harriet Miers. And once again he has thrown out what has become one of my all-time favorite bullshit phrases when referring to any Congressional attempt to find the truth or hold the administration and their republican colleagues on the Hill responsible for their actions:
"This is political theater."
Mr. Snow is not the only one to use this phrase incessantly. It must be high on the list of phrases approved by Karl Rove for use as republican talking points, because it falls so easily from the lips of republican members of Congress. No matter what action our Democratic leadership takes, we find it reduced to this simple phrase, or one of its many permutations: kabuki theater, circus, carnival, or charade. But the message is always clear. The Dems are just acting a part, they can't possibly be serious. I mean, who do these Democratic fools think they are, trying to hold the Unitary Executive and his band of merry men accountable for their actions? Tell the truth? We can't handle the truth!! Or so we're told, both in word and deed. The MSM and Republican shills such as Rush and Bill-O are more than happy to tote the water for these manipulators at every turn.
I tried to do a count on just how many times the phrase "this is political theater" and its brethren has been used to describe Democrats since the election last November, but I found that it's akin to trying to count a mountain of identical straws. There are just too many. I'd have to say that one of my favorite examples plucked from this massive pile of bullshit in straw form has to be from the recent filibuster carried out by the Republicans on the Iraq bill. Testy over the prospect of having to actually carry out their filibuster instead of the usual wink and nod that has replaced executing the threat, the republicans threw in a host of other damning claims ranging from "a mockery" and "a colossal waste of time" to "petty kindergarten games." This, despite the fact that Senate majority leader Reid took compassion on them, laying aside his right to have periodic roll calls to keep the full Senate in the chamber for the duration. I'm sure the irony of the epithet "petty kindergarten games" was lost on the honorable gentlemen on the right side of the aisle as they approached the podium with temper tantrum at the ready.
But when it comes to "political theater," who are the real masters? Who is it that has been manipulating the Congress, the public, the political discourse? Look no further than the Bush administration, puppetmasters extraordinaire. What have we, the American people, been subjected to for well over six years now if not the most impressive demonstration of political theater in modern history? From the color-coded terror alerts and Saddam's weapons of mass destruction to "you're doin' a heck of a job, Brownie," from Plamegate to the U.S. attorney firings, we have been subjected to acts and scenes from the worst political theater, the kind of smoke and mirrors deception that only the most diabolical minds could possibly conceive. It's like one of those old Mickey Rooney/Judy Garland movies where Mickey suddenly jumps up and shouts, "Hey!!! Let's put on a show!!!" and Judy claps her hands and squeals enthusiastically, except it's not a show from the kool kidz, it's the show from hell.
We have been denied access to photos of the caskets of our dead soldiers while Bush shoves renditions, torture and kangaroo courts down our throats. Congress is denied access to information about illegal wiretapping so Bush may continue his nefarious spying and searching of our private lives anyplace he can find data. Any and every possible clue that the administration has hoarded away is cloaked under the blanket of executive privilege and national security. The list goes on and on. The average American cannot possibly keep up with the string pulling, maneuvering, hiding and lying that has taken place. When our eyeballs start to swing in the direction of all this frenetic misbehavior, we're given the "Hey!!! Look over there!!!" treatment with arrests of people whose most terrifying quality is their stupidity, or we're ordered to jump from yellow to orange to red in an insane game of Terror Twister. And as our heads whip around and we gape in fear and amazement in the opposite direction, the evidence is buried under piles of manure that a herd of elephants couldn't manage to produce in a decade.
Yesterday, we were provided with another shocking secret, apparently kept at the highest levels of the administration - evidence that Pat Tillman wasn't just a victim of friendly fire, but may actually have been shot at close range, raising the unthinkable possibility that he was killed on purpose by his own brothers in arms. The initial reports of Tillman's death were used to tout the heroic nature of our brave soldiers in the Afghanistan and Iraq wars. There was no mention early on of anything but battlefield heroics, used to stoke the flames of patriotism. This would no doubt still be the case had it not been for the efforts of Mary Tillman, mother of a man who is truly a fallen hero. Rumors that there was a cover-up afoot first led to allegations of friendly fire, and those allegations have now developed into something far more sinister, with the White House once again claiming executive privilege.
I'm not sure what to make of the Tillman case yet. But it is clear that our sock puppet Unitary Executive believes that what happens in the White House stays in the White House. And the real brains behind the operation just keep those puppet strings dancing. Watch Scooter hopscotch his way out of jail with a non-pardon pardon!! See Rove wiggle his fingers as Bush twitches and spins!! Rumsfeld may be out of sight, but he's still holding hands with Cheney behind the curtain and his legacy is keeping Condi tilting at windmills. And Gonzo? Well, what can I say about Gonzo that even Arlen Spector hasn't already said?
So the next time you hear Tony Snow utter that now classic phrase and see him tap dancing vigorously, just remember whose words he's actually uttering and who is doing the choreography. He can say what he will, but we know the origin of this political masterpiece theater. These guys are the real Puppetmasters.