Congratulations on becoming a fast-emerging sub-group of the Democratic Party.
Last year before the Democratic/Capitulation Party took power, several of you played your capitulation hand early and voted to legalize military commissions that desecrate concepts of due process and eliminate quaint 700-year old notions such as habeas corpus. In case you forgot your vote, the Senate Roll Call is here and the House Roll Call is here.
A few months ago, you spit in the eye of those that elected you and gave George Bush a blank check to conduct an illegal, immoral, bankrupting and national-security-threatening war. In case you forgot your vote, the Senate Roll Call is here and the House Roll Callis here.
Just last Sunday, you decided to make legal an unprecedented violation of privacy that flies in the face of the warrant requirement of the 4th Amendment and condones the Executive’s violation of duly-passed FISA Court laws. In case you forgot the Senate Roll Call is here and the House Roll Call is here.
Regarding last Sunday, I understand your thinking. It makes your political futures "safe" against the privacy-hating portion of your constituency, thus giving you the perfect opportunity to do what’s good for your career instead of what’s good for American citizens, freedom, privacy, the Separation of Powers and the 4th Amendment. Good choice. Now Sean Hannity and the Wall Street Journal Editorial Board will send you cards on Easter.
Since you’re on the right track of protecting your hide from the vast minority of the voting American public, mouth-breathing media elite who wouldn’t recognize reality if it was Paris Hilton’s cellmate, and the institutional Dem consultants who would attempt to triangulate Terry Shiavo into consciousness, I have a few suggestions.
You are the majority in the People’s branch whose powers are enumerated in the first of the Contsitution’s Articles, the Branch that tells the President what to do. Thus, in the interests of everything that is in your personal financial and professional future, please propose the following legislation:
Number One: Redefine "Cruel and Unusual Punishment."
You could always pass legislation to redefine "cruel and unusual punishment." It’s in the Eighth Amendment to the Constitution. If you lost your copy since the November election, use Teh Googles. It could read as follows: "Cruel and Unusual Punishment shall not include waterboarding, Brazilian electrode box-standing, head-to-toe feces covering, sexually-humiliating naked cheerleader pyramiding, fake dog attacking, beating, sleep deprivation or mock executions."
Certainly that would make Darth Dick Cheney happy. Blackwater may even contribute to your reelection campaigns. It’s a win-win!
Number Two: Amend the Executive Power in the Constitution.
Article II of the Constitution defines Presidential Powers. If you lost your copy since the November election, use Teh Googles. I suggest an amendment to Article II of the Constitution to create Amendment 28 which defines:
Magic Scepter of Freedom – The President shall wield the Magic Scepter of Freeom and tap the head of any American citizen or foreigner and declare them an "Enemy Combatant Extraordinaire and Uber Enemy of Democracy, Freedom, Apple Pie, and Jesus." Once so declared, they may be rendered to undisclosed locations to serve 15,000-year sentences for having the audacity to do something that may possibly make The President think you may somehow, tangentially, eight or ten degrees separated, be involved in terrorism, or if you have brown skin and have a non-Anglo-sounding name, or if your neighbor sold you out for a reward. If, indeed, you become an emotional and mental vegetable due to years of sensory depravation and torture, you are forbidden from exercising the last shred of human dignity and committng suicide."
Certainly the Dictator President will approve of such legislation and not unleash his monumental intellect against you.
For icing on the cake, you could further amend the Constitution to replace all references to the "President" with "Unitary Executive."
Number Three: Create the Fourth Branch of Government.
This one is easy. Simply Amend the constitution to state "Any office holder within ten yards of the man-sized safe in the Vice-President’s office is now outside the Executive Branch and thus outside review of the United States of America. This branch is "Fourthbranch" and his powers shall be dictated according to his paranoid fantasies."
Number Four: Abolish All Political Ethics
Such legislation will definitely help those fundraising coffers. Pass a bill stating: "All legislators are for purchase to the highest bidder."
This will fill those campaign accounts to the brim!
Number Five: Remove the Power of Impeachment
I’m surprised you haven’t though of this one already, since you summarily refuse to exercise one of the perfectly legal and politically-palpable tools intended to prevent dictatorial rule in the United States. Article I, Section 2 of the Constitution vests the sole power of impeachment in the House of Representatives. Section 3 of Article I vests the sole power to try impeachments in the Senate. If you lost your copy since the November election, use Teh Googles
You could pass legislation as follows:
"No matter if the Unitary Executive violates the Separation of Powers, Congress’ War Powers, Congress’ Treaty Powers, Habeas Corpus underpinning 9 of the 10 Rights in the First Amendment, Congressional Oversight Rules, the Power of the Purse, the Warrant Requirement in the 4th Amendment, duly-passed laws, abuses the grey areas of International Law to create torture camps, ignores the perpetrators of atrocities such as 9/11, abuses Executive Orders, or if the Unitary Executive lies the United States into a needless war against a country that posed no threat, no member of Congress may bring Impeachment proceedings.
If a member of Congress does so, they will be declared an Enemy Combatant Extraordinaire and Uber Enemy of Democracy, Freedom, Apple Pie, and Jesus."
Perhaps if you follow the above suggestions, the Worst President in History, his party, his allies, the Brain-Dead Media, Dinosaur Dem Consultants, and the 30% of the country with their heads stuck up Bush’s ass will approve of your actions.
Cheers,
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