Disclaimer: This diary is a pure work of fiction. It does not now nor ever resemble any persons living or dead. The events described could never happen. In fact the likelyhood of any of this ever taking place is the same as aliens coming to Earth solely for the purpose of picking up a bag of Doritos.
Drivin' down the interstate listenen' to that Rush feller he almost made me crash my 1986 GMC pick-up with somethin' he said. He said it sure would be funny if some true-blue Americans was to register as inderpendents and go vote for that Obarma feller in the cockus. Now at first I thought ol' Rush had fallen off the wagon again and had popped the top on some of that oxycotton stuff but he did start to make sense. He said that libral McCain was gonna win our primry anyways so we outta just go have a little fun takin' that she-devil out of the race. This could be fun.
Figurin' there wasn't much else to do that day since the bowling alley just burnt down when them guys started lighting their farts and caught the carpet on fire I said what the heck. I went down to the local Piggly-Wiggly and registered with one of those folks sittin' out front. Few days later come afternoon I loaded up my pitbull Daisy and we headed on down to the local community center for the cockus.
Pullin' into the parkin lot I hit a mud puddle and sprayed a bunch a' old folks standin in line. I started to feel kind a bad bout that but I saw they was holding Hillary signs so it wasn't so bad. They started to complain but stopped that quick smart when Daisy started barkin at them. Now I didn't really want to wait in line and I was thinkin a goin home and watching Nascar re-runs but then I spotted Ray in the crowd. You can't miss Ray. He's been wearing the same John Deere hat since 91', 'cept now you can't read it anymore and it kind a looks like that thing Burt Reynolds wears on his head.
Me and Ray waved and he let me cut in line. Hell, it looked like the whole local rotary club was there too, They must'a been listen to Rush too. Later we got inside and there was all this hollerin and jabberin that I couldn't make hide nor hair of. Me and Ray just decided that whenever someone said Hillary we would holler out Obama even louder. Finally after a bunch more talkin' they said we was done and we started to head home. Coming out of the community center a real pretty girl wearing a bunch of Obama buttons stopped us and asked if she could ask us some questions. Me and Ray didn't mind on count of all them buttons was pulling down her top and we could get a good peek at her lung rockets. Ray almost let the cat out of the back when she asked if we was 'cross-over' voters. He yelled out we wasn't no damn bi-sexules and I had to punch him in the kidney to quiet him down. Some a those Obama kids must have been plum tired because they had the same glassy look in their eyes that Ray did that time he tried to steal a six-pack of Miller from the 7-eleven but fell down makin his getaway and cracked his skull open on the sidewalk.
Makin' my way out of the parkin lot I swerved and hit that same mud puddle givin them Hillary folks another bath. I wonder if wheel chairs rust? Me and Daisy both thought that cockus was a lotta fun and I hope ol' Rush comes up with some more good stuff like that to do until they finish rebuilding the bowlin alley.