Breaking news....there's a big-ass hole in Texas. What will the Department of Republican Nomenclature do with this new challenge?
Breaking news! There's a big-ass hole in Texas, and even the experts don't know how far it will go, or how much damage it will cause. Thus far its appetite for destruction seems to know no bounds. One theory is that it got its start from oil drilling. The Department of Republican Nomenclature hasn't settled on a name for the Big-ass Hole in Texas yet, but is expected to go with something like the Normal Terrain Initiative, Perfectly Safe Backyards for America, or simply the Democrats' Fault.
To the tune of "Yellow Rose of Texas:"
There’s a Big-ass Hole in Texas, that’s wide and fairly deep,
No other state will claim it, we say it’s theirs to keep,
It got its start from drilling, destruction knows no bounds,
Republicans have seen it, and named it "Level Grounds."
Go ahead, I bet you can write the next verse without half trying.