This is a short diary. It's both a warning and a benediction. So listen up, my compatriots.
Today Hillary Clinton, a Democrat, will win the West Virginia Primary by huge margins. It will be a trouncing, it will be a drubbing, it will fill the sails of Clinton supporters with pride and a much-needed sense of victory and support and love and acceptance and fight, and that's good, because they are Democrats.
Of course, it won't change the nomination math or the impossibility of earning a majority of pledged delegates. It won't sway Superdelegates. And it won't alter the media narrative. Obama is the nominee.
But Hillary Clinton will win big today. And you know what? It will be like the Puerto Rico Pride parade is going on in Manhattan, and you have to get across town. It will be annoying, you will be vexed. There will be preening and horrible reasoning thrown up all over the internet ("She's ahead in the popular vote!") and taunting, aggressive, in-your-face posts everywhere ("Obamabots just don't get how unelectible Obambi is!").
The lack of reason alone will piss you off. The taunts will be grating.
But you know what? Don't you say a word. Just don't. Make today the day you actually, hey, you know, try something new. Like work productively. Or get that high score on Donkey Kong. Or call Oregon. Or call Kentucky. Or sign up to help register people to vote. Or scrapbook. Hell, it doesn't matter.
Just avoid the fighting today. Let Clinton supporters enjoy their significantly large win. Let them really enjoy it.
So, please. I don't ask much, and I don't ask often, but let the parade go by you today as you sit in your car, waiting, waiting, and just chill.
Relax. I'll buy you a drink.
Because it's May 13, and in two weeks the voting is done.
This thing will be done.
It is done.
Relax.
Update [2008-5-13 11:0:21 by LarsThorwald]: Oh, and also, please, I beg of you: Lay off the "West Virginia is filled with clay-eating racists" crap, too, huh? I grew up near Huntington, I know my West Virginia. Those people have been repeatedly hit in the nuts by circumstances, geography, and the false promises of politicians who don't at the end of the day give a damn about them. It's a complex place, but by no means is the place a racist hotbed with people running around like something out of a bad D.W. Griffith movie. You know what the people I know in West Virginia like to do? Watch football, drink, and hold family close. You want to call Christy Hardin Smith a racist? Chill. Relax. 50 state strategy, remember?