From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE...
Me of Little Faith
Don’t let the title fool you. Comedian Lewis Black comes off as curious and open-minded about religion and spirituality (including eyebrow-raising brushes with psychics and miracles) in his new book, which debuted in the top 10 on the New York Times bestseller list and has hovered there for three weeks. But he also isn't afraid to call bullshit when he sees it.
Noting the recent glut of pro- and anti-religion bestsellers, Black says he wrote Me of Little Faith "Because I think [religion] is taken too seriously, and anything that takes itself too seriously is open to ridicule." At the same time, it's "a book about my own relationship with religion, where my---dare I say it?---spiritual journey has taken me." Over the course of 237 pages, Black spouts off about Jews, Christians, Mormons, televangelists, the Amish, the rapture, creationism, reincarnation, and Heaven...which may or may not be a golf course. And yes, the F-word is used liberally throughout, because "it's not really a word to me, it's a comma."
He also targets religion in politics, including this:
I have never given a shit what religion the president is. He could worship a can of peas for all I care. I just want him to be good at what we elected him to do, which is to lead the United States of America. ...
Of course, if the president is going to be really religious, it would be nice to know that up front, before we elect him. For instance, it would have been helpful to know that Bush the Younger was going to view himself as God's hammer. That's the kind of information I consider important.
I guess the lesson we learned with this administration---or at least that some of us have learned---is to watch when the son of a bitch keeps blowing the religious horn. Maybe we could have convinced him he would have been happier as a preacher instead of the leader of the free world.
I know I would have been.
It's a quick, funny read that makes ya think. And if you don’t buy it you may not get into Heaven.
Cheers and Jeers starts in There's Moreville... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Wednesday July 2, 2008
Note: A programming note for the next few days. Tomorrow's C&J will be posted at its usual time. Friday's commemorative "1776" edition---a cult fave among the grog-swilling crowd---will be posted Friday morning. (Ticked-off west-coasters can file complaints with Michael's Mom, who is visiting from Michigan. But I don’t recommend it.) There will be no regular C&J Monday, but PoliSigh has volunteered to carry the torch in the diaries. After that, it's regular C&Js until October 2025, except for 2015 through 2018, when I'll be having my nervous breakdown at an undisclosed Tiki hut.
---Mgt.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til Barack Obama's birthday: 33
Days 'til Days `til the Machias Wild Blueberry Festival: 44
Nationwide decline in boat sales: 12%
(Source: CNN)
Percent of law students who were women in 1977-78: 28%
Percent of law students today who are women: 47%
(Source: American Bar Association via USA Today)
Number of the five most-conservative Supreme Court justices from the last 70 years who are on the bench now: 4
(University of Chicago study via The Week)
Number of Independent U.S. senators from Connecticut who secretly wish they were Aquaman: 1
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Mid-week Rapture Index: 169 (including an evening rapturizin' with George and a joint appearance of Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton in a town called Unity. Soul Protection Factor 45 lotion is recommended if you’ll be walking amongst the heathen today. (And don’t forget to wear your Son glasses.)
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Next stop: the NASCAR circuit
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CHEERS to plugging in the new Speaker. Hot off the press: Nancy Pelosi is coming to Netroots Nation Saturday morning:
This won't just be any keynote. Speaker Pelosi wants to hear from you. Instead of simply giving a speech at a podium, the Speaker will be taking your questions and interacting with convention attendees.
The event empowers citizens to engage America's current House leader in substantive discussion about current issues, the legislative process, and how citizens can participate in their government. The 9 a.m. keynote will be moderated by Gina Cooper, Netroots Nation's Executive Director.
Two words for the audience: Be civil. Three words for Madam Speaker: Bring a helmet.
CHEERS to best friends forevuh. Yeah, the primary season was a bit rough, but The Nation reports that Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama get along just fine:
This year's Democratic race may have looked edgy. But that was because the talking heads needed something to talk about in front of the cameras that never shut off. The truth is that the Obama-Clinton contest was a throwback to the cozy, insider competitions of old between eyes-on-the-prize pols like Earl Warren and Tom Dewey for the 1948 Republican nod or John Kennedy and Hubert Humphrey in the 1960 Democratic primaries.
In other words, the notion that Obama and Clinton were in a battle to the death was always a theatrical rather than a realistic one. It helped to keep the troops energized during what was, for all practical purposes, a non-ideological exercise in political positioning.
The Unity photo-op was a start. But I'll really believe it when I see them mamboing on Dancing with the Stars.
JEERS to rude awakenings. This is just fuckin' awful: Orange to Blue candidate Darcy Burner's house burned down yesterday morning. She and the family (including the puppy) made it out okay. Special "Thank You" to five year-old son Henry, who woke up Mom and Dad in time to escape. Consider your allowance doubled, kid.
CHEERS to open rebellion. On July 2, 1776, the Continental Congress passed a resolution saying that "these United Colonies are, and of right ought to be, free and independent States." Luckily Edward Rutledge had a camera phone and recorded the whole thing. I knew it---Hancock was a nose picker.
CHEERS and JEERS to faith-based initiatives, Obama-style. Who knows, maybe Barack---with his community-organizing experience---could turn the office into something palatable even to secularists, I dunno. I'll turn the discussion over to Pastor Dan:
As such, it's good politics. But it keeps alive the pattern of propitiating a religious demographic with federal money, which I'm opposed to on philosophical grounds. The system of public-private partnerships before Bush worked just fine. There may have been problems with religious groups getting appropriate access to social-services money in the past, but those were fixed under the Clinton Administration. In contrast, the Faith-Based Initiatives was never anything more than a giveaway to friends of the GOP. I'm not sure why it is that we should keep alive a potent stream of patronage, even if it is to be controlled by a Democrat.
Because, Dan, I'm about ready to open my own church, that's why. We'll feed the hungry, shelter the homeless, and show porn on weekends. The first two we can handle. But premium nudie flicks ain't cheap (or so we hear).
CHEERS to clearing your name. Nelson Mandela was officially removed from the federal terrorist watch list yesterday, so now he can travel to the United States freely. But make sure somebody checks his shoes, anyway. All that white hair and worldy gravitas looks suspicious.
CHEERS to leveling the playing field. On July 2, 1964, President Johnson signed into law a sweeping civil rights bill that had been passed by Congress just five hours earlier. If you see a racist today, give 'em a greeeeat big hug. They're still smarting.
TSK TSK to mocking the maverick. Wow, someone else has jumped on the Wes Clark bandwagon to argue that military service doesn’t automatically qualify one for the presidency. And I quote:
"Absolutely not...I absolutely don’t believe that it’s necessary." [National Journal, 2/15/03] "I believe that military service is the most honorable endeavor an American may undertake. But I’ve never believed that lack of military service disqualifies one from occupying positions of political leadership or as Commander and Chief." [American Legion Speech, 9/7/99]
"The question I ask myself every morning while shaving in front of the mirror is: OK, John, you’re an incredible war hero, an inspiration to all Americans. But what qualifies you to be president of the United States?" [Minneapolis Star Tribune, 11/7/99]
Shocking! How dare John McCain attack John McCain! John McCain needs to apologize to John McCain and call off his attack dog, John McCain. (Is this the weirdest campaign ever, or is it just me?)
CHEERS to the year of the ear. Some unexpected good news. Looks like the corn crop will be better than expected in the wake of recent flooding, so the ethanol will flow more or less freely (does anyone actually eat corn anymore?). So now that that's behind us...what about the pot crops? What about the pot crops???!!!
CHEERS to iResurrection. Over the weekend I was cleaning the house and I came across my old iPod Mini, which died two years ago and had been sitting in a drawer. Just for the hell of it I plugged it in to see what would happen. It charged up just fine and has been working without a hitch ever since. But what's even more amazing is, I was cleaning the house.
JEERS to bad omens. On July 2 in, respectively, 1961, 1998 and 2004, we lost Ernest Hemingway, Jimmy Stewart and Marlon Brando. And in 1881 President Garfield was shot. And on this date in 1937, Amelia Earhart and navigator Fred Noonan disappeared over the Pacific Ocean while attempting to get the beverage cart down the aisle during their round-the-world flight. I think I'm gonna go back to bed.
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Three Years Ago in C&J: July 2, 2005...
CHEERS to just desserts. Stick a fork in him. Lightweight Tucker Carlson's new show on MSNBC sucks elephant balls on both ratings and content. Ever tried infomercials, pal?
CHEERS to Arianna. Ms. Huffington is staying on top of Cheney's mysterious Vail hospital visit. Doctors were apparently concerned about him enough to administer an EKG. They thought his heart had started beating again.
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And just one more...
JEERS to shitting on my punchlines. Last Friday in C&J I wrote this (please note the part in bold):
CHEERS to finally having a reason to sit in a darkened theatre. After six months of forgettable dreck from Hollywood (really, guys...you need to hire Jeff Lieber now), it appears we may have our first exceptional, feel-good movie of 2008, courtesy of the Toy Story/Finding Nemo miracle workers. ... It's a cautionary tale about the consequences of environmental catastrophe and wretched human excess. It's also about robot-robot love. Place your bets on how long it'll take the right-wing fundies to proclaim it a recruitment film orchestrated by Al Gore and MoveOn.org to turn our children into godless gay vegan tree-huggers. My guess: about six hours ago.
I was joking. Joking I tell you!! But apparently there's nothing crazy you can say about the knuckledraggers anymore that won’t come true. This is one of several comments documented at Think Progress four days after Wall-E's release:
It was like a 90-minute lecture on the dangers of over consumption, big corporations, and the destruction of the environment. ... Much to Disney’s chagrin, I will do my part to avoid future environmental Armageddon by boycotting any and all WALL-E merchandise and I hope others join my crusade.
I can't believe it. They've altered their behavior to become virtually lampoon-proof. I...I think I'm in awe. Either that or I gotta fart. Hnggggghhhhhng... Nope, it's definitely awe.
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Oh, and the economy is going to be shit shit shit shit shit shit shit for a wee bit longer than the Very Serious People originally told us. Have a nice day. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
"We are as a society finally coming to grips with what it means to cheer and jeer. It doesn't just mean to have sex with someone else."
---Douglas Snyder
Texas A&M University-College Station
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