Jets acquire Brett Favre
This is a story of unprecedented importance. The Favre era has now begun. Just like Broadway Joe, Brett will lead Gang Green to the promised land. Joe's deal with the devil has now expired. Meet the next superbowl champion team!!!!!
In other news....
Rove indicted for meddling in the Siegleman case
Cheney sent to jail for outing Valerie Plame
Alberto Gonzales admits firing US attorneys for political reasons.
Donald Rumsfeld's new book contains a mea culpa about not really listening to commanders in the field when they said they needed more troops.
Condi Rice announces that she will become George Bush's second wife. The new family will be moving to a compound in Utah.
Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid announce that they were in on the whole FISA warrentless spying thing all along and announce their retirement. Dennis Kucinich becomes speaker of the house, Chris Dodd becomes Senate Majority Leader.
Joe Lieberman says that Ned Lamont was really the better candidate all along and requests that he replaces him in the Senate.
Harriet Myers and John Bolten say WTF.... I'll go talk to congressional committees under oath.
John McCain announces, Ya know... maybe I'm just not up to this whole President thing.
James Carville has filed for divorce from Mary Matalin... says it was all a publicity stunt.
Senator Craig officially comes out of the closet. Will lead the Gay pride parade in Greenwich Village.
John Bolton uses "Just for Men" hair coloring on his moustache. It now matches his hair. Does a new commercial with Keith Hernandez and Walt "Clyde" Frazier.
Grover Norquist attacked by giant sewer alligator while trying to drown government in bathtub.
Dana Perino and Ari Fleischer join Scott McLellan in saying that they were completely full of shit the whole time.
... and George Bush resigns....says this job just wasn't as fun as I thought it would be. On a mind clearing vacation in Amsterdam accidently walks in to the Hague and is charged for war crimes.