Only Al Gore can save us. John Edwards has the right message at the right time -- the real progressive. Chris Dodd -- strong on FISA! Only Barack Obama is change -- only Barack Obama can save us from Hillary Clinton -- I'm thrilled to support him. Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton will be an unbeatable dream team. John Edwards for VP. Al Gore for VP. Jim Webb is the VP choice that will make this a winning ticket. Mark Warner is G-d. Wes Clark is the greatest Presidential Vice-Presidential candidate ever. Michael Bloomberg. Chuck Hagel. Bill Richardson. Bill Clinton. Tim Kaine. Joe Biden. Chet Edwards (he's not John Edwards).
Meanwhile, in the real world...
Global warming, wars, famines, crashing economies, plunging dollars, plunging necklines (hey, it ain't all bad news), plunging waistlines (please, just say no to crack -- isn't underwear supposed to be under?), hurricanes, droughts, peak oil, soaring energy prices, joblessness and health care costs.
Don't worry though. We'll do our best to focus on the important stuff. How many houses does John McCain own anyway?