John McCain has unilaterally suspended his campaign and called upon Barack Obama to do the same. McCain's campaign stated, "He has asked Senator Obama to journey with him to Washington to lead a bipartisan effort to solve this problem." Furthermore, The Journey the McCain campaign has sketched out appears to be some sort of mystical quest fraught with weird challenges and feats of strength. "My friends, for the sake of the economy, I ask Senator Obama to put aside petty politics, and instead reach into one of five numbered holes in a large rock."
Anticipating criticism that the challenge amounts to an arbitrary series of stunts, McCain declared, "With the economy in crisis, the only way we can inspire confidence is to truly show what the candidates are made of." Following this brief statement, McCain threw a t-shirt at the crowd and held a lit match to a can of AquaNet until he was able to escape from the press.
The Obama campaign appears likely to resist calls to transform the campaign into a peyote-fueled VisionQuest, declaring, "The debate is on." The McCain campaign shot back, "Senator Obama may think squabbling is more important than this financial crisis, but there's nothing to prevent John McCain from faking a seizure during the debates and then--amid the confusion--running off to save the economy."
Leaked memos from the McCain campaign appear to give clues to further strategy in dealing with the crisis. In one scenario, codenamed "Annie!", McCain fakes his own death and disguises himself as an orphaned newsie. Details are sketchy but it appears McCain will then solve the crisis from behind the protective walls of the orphanage.