For Simple Sarah it had to have been a tough choice between Cosmetology School or the University of Idaho journalism department. She graduated in 1987 after attending four other schools.
All of us here in Northern Idaho, Moscow, to be exact, are thrilled that a University of Idaho alumnus is being considered for the vice presidency. If Sarah Heath Palin's journalism degree from U of I is a qualification for this high office then we have even more folks that can help.
Secretary of Defense--We have Hoss! Witnesses marvel at how Hoss took two direct blows to the skull with a metal chair and just shook his head in a recent barroom brawl. He is one tough hombre! He and McCain would scare the hell out of those wimpy terrorists.
Head of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms--We have one of the most highly qualified versatile community members here that could shake up this agency! Talk about a maverick. I present Jimbo. He drinks hard and heavy daily and owns the Corner Club Bar's record for chugging pitchers of beer--six in ten minutes. He has his own patented hangover cure, smokes cigars, three packs of Marlboros per day, chews Skoal, and is a crack shot. He recently hit 20 consecutive road signs dead center while flying down the highway at 65 miles per hour. He is very anti-drug and a leader in the local DARE program. Name one liberal with these kind of credentials.
Head of EPA-- You think Palin's qualifications are stellar? Well, then you will be flabbergasted with Big Shirley's qualifications. This proud gun owner and NRA member has clear, precise answers to our pressing environment concerns. An example? Big Shir's answer to what to do with drowning polar bears is insightful and pragmatic. She would make sausage from them and feed the homeless. She would make jerky from some of the wasted carcasses and airdrop them to our troops in the field. Granted, her recent arrest for shooting endangered golden eagles and selling the feathers at the Saturday farmer's market could be spun by liberals as negative but she explains: "This is a private land ownership issue. Those damn birds were flying over my land and wouldn't quit despite my repeated warnings to them. I have a right, as do all true Americans, to do what I please on my own land. My only mistake was not shooting the goddamn warden that showed up at my property. Hey, by the way have you ever tried smoked eagle leg?"
But I digress. I'm sorry but when I think about all of our qualified people and the change they could bring to our country I get a bit verbose. I really wanted to tell you about the University of Idaho and Moscow.
The U of I is know as Beer U. The residents and students both beam with pride when repeating claims that Moscow leads the nation in per capita beer consumption. The school is known throughout the west as a great "party school" and came in fourth in the country in a recent survey of Top Schools Where Students Almost Never Study. This is a land grant college with it's latest claim to fame being the cloning of the mule: Idaho Gem, who has a face that looks remarkably like Pat Buchanan. These sound like jokes but are true. Well, I threw in the Buchanan thing.
Moscow is a little town of 30,000 with clean air, a simple small downtown area, two malls, and a couple of movie theaters. The town is surrounded by family owned and operated farms, mostly wheat, lentils and peas. The winters here are harsh with lots of snow, and last at least six months. Since entertainment opportunities are limited,drinking alcohol is the primary thing to do for most of the school year. Eight miles away is another college town, Pullman, Washington that houses the PAC-10 Washington State University. The area is filled and dominated by college students. WSU has 20,000 and U of I about 10,000. The city of Moscow (MOS-co not Mos-COW we are not Russian here) is divided into thirds.
The first group is granola eaters, Food Co-Op shoppers, and impressive leftists. A popular website is called: "Auntie Establishment" and this group caused a huge turmoil when they started some topless car washes for fund raising. (Yes, my car was very, very clean at that time).
The second group is the Doug Wilson Christians and they are as far right as it gets. Wilson is a national figure in the homeschooling world and has written some incredible stuff on slavery and marriage roles. One of his essays on slavery claimed that basically slavery wasn't that bad of a deal for Black people. He started a Christian college- St Andrews-and the campus is in the center of town. He and his followers own about a third of the businesses in town. His office is directly across from the Food Co-Op and the two groups are constantly battling one another.
The last group is the conservative town people. There are lots of pickups, guns, Bush stickers, and they have a love/hate relationship with the university. Most would claim to be libertarians but are actually mostly right wing true believers.
Okay, so why is this important? Which of these three groups do you think our simple Sarah would lean toward? Well, some say Wilson makes Pat Robertson look like Barney Frank. But I have no proof of any connection other than Palin and Wilson spout the same Christian nonsense.
The U of I is just a simple, easy school. It has a law school, engineering, and good programs in animal research and crop research. Simple Sarah got a degree in journalism here which makes me laugh aloud. A journalism major has got to be one of the top three easiest majors at this easy school. For Simple Sarah it had to have been a choice between that and Cosmetology School. She never published anything in the college paper, she took television production classes.
I love Moscow and work there. But the U of I is not a top-rated university even by western standards, everyone knows it and agrees. This is not a western equivalent of Harvard. Most of the kids live in fraternities or sororities and are away from home for the first time. The only minorities are athletes really. Foreign students make up only 2% of the population. Nearly 80% of applicants get into the school. SAT scores are 900-1200 range. It is inexpensive, about $5,000 a year and does what it is supposed to do- provide a bit of education at a rate that the Idaho State Legislature deems reasonable. Remember, we are talking Idaho here. This state may be the most conservative state in the nation and lily white. They don't spend money on colleges, or any schools, if they can avoid it
In short, Simple Sarah doesn't have the governmental experience which could be forgiven, I guess, if you could balance it out with superior life experience or rigorous academic preparation. Compare her to Elizabeth Dole who has a degree from Duke, advanced degrees in education and government from Harvard and graduated from law school there. Or Condolezza Rice with a masters degree from Notre Dame and a doctorate from University of Denver. How about Kay Bailey Hutchison. She got a law degree from the University of Texas. All three of these Republican women had impressive academic histories before entering public life. Nobody around here would ever say the U of I was a rigorous test without spitting their beer out while laughing.
http://www.uiargonaut.com/...
htthttp://encarta.msn.com/encnet/departments/college/?article=never_studyp://
www.class.uidaho.edu/ngier/Wilson.htm
http://www.uiargonaut.com/...
http://www.moscow.id.us/
http://hnn.us/...
http://www.uidaho.edu/...
watch this:
simple sarah