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Almost every high school in America had a Sarah Palin.  Most of us hated her more than any other person in the school.  I sure did.

Mine was this blonde girl (Name withheld) who was considered the best looking girl in the school, a sentiment I shared.  Her mother was on the PTA. (more on this later)  I wasn't the star athlete or the guy with the Mercedes in the lot so my chances of sleeping with her were zero.  (I understand great looks doesn't mean lousy person, there are exceptions.)

My Sarah Palin had the smile, had the wink, would play up her body to get attention, and considered herself the most important person in the school.  But we hated her not because of her looks but because she was the ugliest person on the inside we had ever met.  She was cruel, mean spirited, nasty, overly self absorbed, and yes a dimwit.

Our Sarah Palin would act charming to certain guys and had that smile but if you weren't part of her clique or the guys deemed socially at the top of the latter, she treated you like shit.  The exception was when she needed one of the "smart guys" to do her work for her.  Those who criticized her, and I was one of them, were labeled as angry haters and jealous.  The fact is, it was our Sarah Palin who was the biggest hater in high school.

Our Sarah Palin was considered an absolute moron by classmates. And for very good reason.  She wouldn't have been able to find Iraq on a map and probably did think that Africa was a country.

Our Sarah Palin was about power and would use her body, her fake smile, and all means necessary to attain it.  She felt she could do whatever she pleased and basically she did. This is the life of a Sarah Palin, you think you have some entitlement to do whatever you want. Unfortunately high school didn't have the same rules for everybody.

Junior prom was the awakening for our Sarah Palin.  She went to the prom expecting to be named homecoming queen by almost everybody.  However, the community organizers found another attractive girl who was also a good person and put her name into nomination. Ironically enough her first name was Tina. So the word was spread to vote for Tina instead of our Sarah Palin. And our Tina (cute dark haired girl) won.  

But that's not the end of it.  At the prom, when the announcement was made that Tina had actually won, our Sarah Palin stormed out of the event in an avalanche of tears and threw an amazing temper tantrum at the junior prom for about 30 minutes.  People laughed but others were shocked that she did not win.

But our Sarah Palin wasn't done.  Her mother, the PTA mom, cried foul and ran up to the school the next day insisting that the vote be overturned.  Her mother even introduced a resolution at the next board meeting to have her daughter installed as prom queen in place of Tina.  Thankfully, her attempts failed.

By senior prom, Sarah Palin was back running again but got crushed and didn't even finish in the top two.

Who is Sarah Palin?  Yes she's the moron we laugh at and yes she's the gift all late night talk show hosts crave.  But she's also the meanest, most vicious, and nastiest person in the room.  We all knew her in high school.  And would you want that person in charge of anything?  God no.

Originally posted to conservodem on Sat Nov 08, 2008 at 05:27 AM PST.

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