Today is the day she was born, 28 years ago. Today is a day our family, my husband and I and our 20-year-old and 8-year-old daughters, talk about, think about and remember our oldest child. On January 18 it will be 10 years since she and her friend were killed by black ice in a car crash in Michigan.
I was thinking this morning about how she would have been 28 today, wondering if she would have been married, maybe even have a child.
And that led me to think about our troops -- how so many of them are of a similar age, and how many of their families have also suffered such a loss -- a loss of a loved one and a loss of dreams, plans and hopes.
There was nothing we could have done to prevent our daughter's death. It was just an awful example of random bad luck. But the deaths in Iraq, the terrible injuries, maiming, chronic illness and disability, those were all preventable.
Our daughter's life in pictures: from baby to just barely 18:
The thoughts about my daughter's death led me to think about our son -- who had a stroke when he was almost 3 and was severely handicapped thereafter. And that led me to think about the soldiers who have survived Iraq but who are now disabled.
Some have suffered terrible physical damage, some have debilitating brain injuries, and so many of them suffer emotionally from the trauma of their experience.
And just like I can't think about my son for very long, it's just too damn painful, I also end up stopping myself from thinking about all those soldiers with terrible disabilities and how difficult their lives and their families' lives must be.
And finally that leads me to the overwhelming picture of the deaths and injuries to the Iraqi people themselves.
I'm a numbers person, and while I use numbers to insulate me from the pain of thinking of suffering people as individuals, I also use numbers to frame the terrible impact of events on people:
The raw numbers from Iraq:
Here is a tally of American military casualties:
4,130 American soldiers killed
30,182 American soldiers wounded
http://www.globalsecurity.org/...
There are other current estimates of 4,200 American soldiers killed.
Iraqi deaths -- this is a very controversial topic with a wide range of estimates:
At the low end: 89,079 - 97,234 documented Iraqi civilian deaths.
http://www.iraqbodycount.org/
At the high end -- data more than a year old from a study published in the Lancet (highly respected British medical journal) and from an independent survey:
A team of American and Iraqi epidemiologists estimates that 655,000 more people have died in Iraq since coalition forces arrived in March 2003 than would have died if the invasion had not occurred.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/...
Note: source is WaPo article about the Lancet article because I couldn't bring up the original article online.
and even higher numbers from another survey:
Following responses to ORB’s earlier work, which was based on survey work undertaken in primarily urban locations, we have conducted almost 600 additional interviews in rural communities. By and large the results are in line with the ‘urban results’ and we now estimate that the death toll between March 2003 and August 2007 is likely to have been of the order of 1,033,000. If one takes into account the margin of error associated with survey data of this nature then the estimated range is between 946,000 and 1,120,000.
http://www.opinion.co.uk/...
More recently, and in between the high & low numbers, from the World Health Organization:
9 JANUARY 2008 | GENEVA/BAGHDAD -- A large national household survey conducted by the Iraqi government and WHO estimates that 151 000 Iraqis died from violence between March 2003 and June 2006.
The study found that violence became a leading cause of death for Iraqi adults after March 2003 and the main cause for men aged 15-59 years. It indicated that on average 128 Iraqis per day died of violent causes in the first year following the invasion and that the average daily violent death toll was 115 in the second year and 126 in the third year
I keep thinking -- more than 100 Iraqi deaths per day -- every day, hundreds more family members are mourning their losses.
http://www.who.int/...
I have looked but can't find any clear estimates of the number of Iraqis wounded and/or disabled by the war. But there is this 2005 quote (from IBC, the source with the lower-end estimates of Iraqi civilian deaths):
According to an analysis by Hamit Dardagan, who compiles statistics for Iraq Body Count, a group that tracks civilian deaths, about three Iraqis are wounded in the war for each one who dies.
http://www.nytimes.com/...
If the 151,000 Iraqi deaths is anything close to accurate, then by now, 1/2 million Iraqis have been wounded -- just think if every single man, woman and child within the city limits of Cleveland had been wounded, many so severely that they would never really recover. That's what our little invasion of a country in the middle east has caused.
Trying to prevent weapons of mass destruction from being turned on us? Our war has been a weapon of mass destruction for the people of Iraq and for our own soldiers.
Accidents happen and people die. We have to live with the results and hope that we can repair our lives.
But preemptive wars, wars waged for ego, power and greed do not have to happen. Families should not be in mourning, desperately trying to put their lives back together because of the colossal stupidity and arrogance of our leaders.
(NOTE: I wrote this on her birthday, Nov 20, but just was able to complete it this morning).