Thanks to Affirmation for posting these personal stories
I’m very grateful to have heard from many of the readers about my previous post about the Mormon Church and our movement’s relationship with it. I received many passionate, heartfelt responses, many of which were strongly opposed to my stance, but which I was still grateful to hear from.
As a person of color, I often fight the false choice the LGBT community sometimes forces on me about whether or not my identity as South Asian and my identity as a queer man can co-exist. I feel a special bond with LGBT Mormons because I feel that they also are told by both the Mormon Church and the LGBT community that they’re an oxymoron.
I cannot speak for them, but I can speak for me. I’ll negotiate my identities in my own way, but I expect you to treat me based on my own actions, not on the actions of my ethnic group or church. Is that not how any human would want to be judged? Anyway...
Many LGBT Mormons have been very hurt by the church and no longer identify as members of the LDS Church. Some are no longer with us, having chosen to end their lives. I honor those lost voices.
At the same time, I’ve discovered voices within the Mormon queer movement that to me have created a different response. To me it sounds like "We’re Here. We’re Queer. We’re Mormon. Get Used To It."
I want to take a slight step back, and introduce you to two individuals who make me proud.
Reader, meet the first 2 No More Mr. Nice Mormons, Mark Oliver & Clark Pingree
Amidst my feelings of frustration, betrayal and grief, I am reminded of one principle I was taught by my parents: Rise above injustice and take the higher road. I am also reminded of the Christian principles I was taught in church: Turn the other cheek, love God and love your fellow men. As much as we feel the Mormon Church has abandoned loving their fellow men, we must turn the other cheek and take the higher road. We much rise above this injustice and open up constructive, thought-provoking dialogue with our friends and our foes. We must tell our stories.
Those in opposition to us are strong in their convictions and we must be too. Like the Mormons, we must organize and give of our time, our talents and our resources to fight for what we believe is right. Equality is right. We must rise above the sordid tactics used by the "Yes on 8" campaign and fight with integrity and dignity. And let us remind ourselves, we are on the right side of history. In the religion in which I grew up, and in every major religion that exists on the face of the earth, there is one teaching that will eventually bring everyone to the table of equality as brothers and sisters in this human family: to treat everyone as we ourselves would like to be treated. May it be so. And may it be now.
I first saw this video on a bus back to New York City to be with my family and old friends. The power of this video made me quiver in my seat. As I look out my window on the slowly approaching home of mine that is New York, I hope that there are voices here as strong as Mark and Clark. Their strength makes me swell with pride when I remember that these men are members of our community. I will do anything, anything , to aid them on their quest of using non-violence and personal stories as a component to fight the hate, and that includes respecting their choice of belief system.
I honor their religion because I honor these strong men who are pouring so much into helping our LGBT community and the fight for marriage equality. Even in the dark, twisted and bigoted world of many Mormon Church leaders I can still see hope for change. I can only see that hope because of Mormons like Mark & Clark. Mormons like these two men have the power to at least help force their Church to try and explain their bigoted actions in the eyes of the world, if not make them think twice next time.
I thank the thousands of Mormons who contributed to the No on 8 campaign with their time and money. I thank the Mormons who had those difficult conversations with their kin, that came out, that linked their oppression as Mormons to the oppression of LGBT people. It’s because of those Mormons that this colored boy from the east coast can connect with West Coast queer and allied Mormons. We share a commonality, and we seek to overcome our own hate to take a higher road and continue the fight for equality.
Mark and Clark also made very good points on our need to organize even more. I’ve been in contact with the D.C. organizers behind D.C. for Marriage, and I intend on helping to turn out people to the December 11th town hall forum on marriage equality in the District. Prop 8 has sparked movement building even in far away D.C. With talk of marriage equality bills being voted on in D.C. in as little as 2 months from now, we must organize now.
I was derided for being a "Kumbaya" type activist. I guess these people don’t know me, because I pour my heart and soul into queer activism, at the expense of my meager college kid budget and schedule. Let’s all take that extra step up in our activism. Now’s the moment and we need all the allies we can get, Mormon, Christian, Black, White, Brown, Athiest, Jew or whatever. We just ask that you be willing to fight for equality. In return for your time, I can only hope that fellow activists can respect your multiple identities, be it your race, your religious beliefs or any other identity.