Being very unemployed and in the entertainment industry here in Los Angeles (I'm a writer/editor/sound designer/animator/voice over actor/you name it really), I spend a lot of time looking at the TV/Film/Radio jobs section.
I think most of you who visit job websites know that a lot of really shady jobs offers get posted there and entertainment (which includes the adult film industry) is a shady business to begin with. I thought I'd share some of the recent shady ads. Some of them are quite entertaining. All of these are actual ads found on Craigslist's current buffer and I wish I had saved some of the older ones because these are nowhere near the cream of the crop.
I've deleted all contact info, URLs, etc.
These are examples of a common theme... make a porn job sound better than it is. No matter what kind of bullshit you wrap it in, in the end, you're still a looking for a porn star (or the network-safe equivalent)-
LUCRATIVE OPPORTUNITY- ADULT FILM/PRINT -FEMALE ONLY
SEEKING 1 NEW INDIVIDUAL INTERESTED IN ADULT FILM/PRINT CAMPAIGN. NO
EXPERIENCE NECESSARY. SEEKING A NEW FACE AND GOOD ATTITUDE.
HIGHLY LUCRATIVE - SERIOUS APPLICANTS ONLY.
MUST BE ATTRACTIVE & MOTIVATED
FEMALE ONLY
$100 if you Makeout with a Stranger on TV
The title says it all! Brand-new FOX prime-time show is looking for folks who would make-out with a stranger in front of millions of Americans on national TV for $100.
Looking for Guys and Gals!
Always wanted your 15 minutes of fame?
Maybe you're an amazing kisser and you want to show America your skills?
Let us know why you'd be perfect for this and we'll get you all the info on the show!
Please submit the following when you reply:
PHOTO
Name
Phone Number
Age
Location
Why We Should Pick YOU!
Submit ASAP
I'm guessing the show is called "Who Wants Herpes?"
Then there's the 'we can't be bothered to hire real employees so we'll make it into a quick cash scheme' ads-
XXXXXXXXXXXXX.com – Get Paid For Your Celeb Photos!
Do you have recent photos of a celebrity?
XXXXXXXXXXXX.com is the NEW celebrity website that actually PAYS you to post your celebrity photos and blog about them directly on our site (tell us about any news and gossip...or just speak your mind about the celebrity).
You can create an account directly on XXXXXXXXXXXX.com and start getting paid for uploading your photos and stories today!
Why the term 'Reality Show' is a lie:
Reality Show Needs Your Videos
New reality series needs your 60 to 90-second videos. Production company currently shooting a pilot (for non-broadcast) needs your 60-90 second videos in the style of "Intervetion" on A&E. Are you a GREAT actor? Can you act like you're on drugs and need help? Can you act like your spouse is cheating or has left you and you don't know what to do? Can you act like you just lost your job, are about to lose your home and want to end it all? Can you act like you just found out your Dad is gay? We are looking for dramatic, intense home-like videos explaining your biggest problem in life and why you need a life makeover. Tears are a plus. Videos should be shot on DV. We only need 5 great tapes, so please e-mail us first with your idea.
But my absolute favorite are the 'We Want to Abuse You' ads and wow, are there a lot of them. They're mostly done by channels that do a lot of reality TV shows that need fodder and, essentially, ask for your help in voluntarily embarrassing yourself on national television. For instance, how to end your friendship-
MTV looking for best friends for a fun new GAME SHOW called Frenemies!
Frenemies
"A game of truth and a test of friendship"
We are looking for fun and outgoing groups of girls who want to compete on a new game show for MTV!
The game is simple. We ask two teams of self-proclaimed "tight & trustworthy trios" to face off in three rounds of questioning to test how well they know each other.
The closer you and your BFF's are, the greater your chances of winning!
Think you and your two best friends have what it takes??
Is your apartment an embarrassing vermin-infested shithole? We want to beam it into 100 million homes!
Can't sleep because of BEDBUGS? FREE help from the DISCOVERY CHANNEL!
Right now, the Discovery Channel hit series VERMINATORS is looking for the pest jobs no one else can handle, the problems that are out of control and the infestations of epic proportions.
We are specifically looking for homes and businesses plagued with BEDBUGS, and best of all, we want to rid your life of them for FREE!
The VERMINATORS are the best of the best in the pest-busting business, so if you or someone you know has a problem, send your story, pictures and video to XXXXXXXXXXXX.com!
Finally, there are some that are just plain weird-
PHOTOGRAPHY: EX BEAUTY QUEEN AND EX GOVER
Photographer needed for photo shoot of former Miss Universe and retired state governor. Only bragging rights. NO pay or commercial use of photos. Your camera or ours!
Send resume and link to portfolio for consideration.
I imagine this person was just flooded with calls:
Looking for Little People that have RODEO skills for a TV
i'm a casting director from the los angeles area looking for little people that have rodeo skills. you will need to come in to our studios in hollywood to audition and you MUST be available for the shoot date which is dec. 16-21.
please contact me right away if you fit the bill (or know anyone that fits the bill)...this is somewhat of a time sensitive matter. you can either email me at XXX@XXXXXXX.XXX or call me on my cell at XXX-XXX-XXXX.
pays SAG scale--which equals about 560 a day plus residuals (which means you will additionally get paid according to how many times the commercial airs on tv).
thanks so much!
xxxxx xxxxxxx
This one does get props for honesty-
VH1 Casting SINGLE MILLIONAIRES looking for a TROPHY WIFE
Looking for the ultimate TROPHY WIFE?
Reality TV Star and Playboy Cybergirl, MEGAN HAUSERMAN, is looking for a man who will shower her with LOVE and MONEY.
VH1 is casting SINGLE MEN of the HIGHEST PEDIGREE to compete for the bikini clad bombshell from ROCK OF LOVE 2, CHARM SCHOOL and I LOVE MONEY.
If you are a single man with the net worth of $1,000,000 or more, then Megan would love to meet you.
Whether you are a CEO or a TRUST FUND BABY, Megan would make the perfect arm candy for any man...who can afford her!
Please email your
Name
Age
Occupation
Net Worth
Contact Number
Email
And
A short bio
To TrophyWife@XXXXXXXXX.com
All applicants must be 21 +