Well it had to happen so I thought I might as well be the one who starts it, and I claim all copyright. Please send all royalties to LaFeminista.Inc, The Cayman Islands.
We have for example
The Oxford English Dictionary
You know the boring sensible cross referenced and profoundly researched standard meanings of words.
http://www.askoxford.com/
The Urban Dictionary
Filled with new and interesting versions of commonly used words not quite meaning what was originally intended.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/
The Devils Dictionary:
The real meanings of words from a cynical standpoint.
http://www.thedevilsdictionary.com
So I would like to start a whole new dictionary to enable us to properly understand the parallel universe the republicans inhabit so welcome to:
The Wingnut and Talibangelical Dictionary.
Here is the Shorter WTD any additions that you seem fit will be used in the Abridged WTD to be published in 2012.
Atheist
De facto worshipper of Satan whilst claiming no belief in our Lord Jesus Christ. Includes Catholics, Mormons, Muslims, Jews, Buddhists, Taoists ad infinitum, who must all be converted to the one true faith and be baptised in name of Jesus.
Sub categories:
Agnostic: Undercover atheist
Non-theist: Jesus denier.
Brain
Unimportant vestigial organ not to be fed useless information, if used it can become painfully inflamed potentially leading towards individuality.
Catholic[s]
Worshipper[s] of Mary, erstwhile allies in the war against women's rights, tend to be a little wishy washy on social issues, but rejoice, for come the rapture they are fucked.
Democrat[s]
Member[s] of Satan's horde who may even commit the worst crime in the world by saying they believe in Jesus and utter the profound heresy of "Jesus was a liberal" and use "Jesus loves" without the appropriate context such as 'Jesus loves America'.
Empathy
A liberal sentiment hence an abomination to be overcome with guns and Jesus.
Please note evolution is now no longer a word and has been removed-LF Inc.
Faith
The belief that the commentary of Rush Limbaugh [blessed be his name] is the word of God and through him salvation lies.
God [alternative spelling GOP]
A word of no intrinsic meaning unless associated as follows:
God bless America.
If used by another country it is blasphemy hence holy war should ensue.
Note Gun: God's current manifestation on earth.
Homosexual
Individuals that tend to form into parades and talk about marriage as a right and not an obligation. Homosexuals are to be righteously vilified and be blamed for all the ills in the world, a useful campaign tool to motivate the bigoted base.
The denying of basic human rights to this group is a sacred task and is the most important issue in America today.
If ignored and allowed to live their lives in peace and equality 'Teh Gay Agenda' will then force us all to marry our goats.
Apple pie is a well known cure for homosexuality.
Internet
Not fully understood as yet but nearly as bad as the concept of the Free Press.
Blog: used to spread lies about our leaders, to be trolled at every opportunity by suicide sockpuppets.
Note: Holy Tools is in development to enable the faithful to avoid any contact with free thought.
Jew[s]
A group way too powerful to mess with, their humour has been known to destroy worlds.
Well known to piss off Muslims and that cant be bad.
Come the rapture they are fucked [re: catholic] so have patience.
Klansman
Warrior for the word and protector of God's people, not to be talked about in public as some may get the wrong idea. We need the votes.
Liberals
Physical manifestation of Demons, if touched by one you will spontaneously combust.
Liberal policy: The word of Satan.
Mormon.
Group used to terrorise the general population by smiling and spouting crazy stuff whilst you are trying to do something important like feeding the cat.
Be patient as they are useful to the cause, and anyway after the rapture their smiles will be wiped of their faces by the lords retribution.
No
Republican policy in a nutshell [as in containing nuts].
Obama
The Anti-Christ.
Lucky the rapture is now due, just say No.
Protestant.
The chosen people with the exception of Methodists, Lutherans, Calvinists, Anglicans, and all those other mealy mouthed liberal churches whose followers are all going to get it come the rapture.
Question.
Not allowed to be asked.
To be ignored when heard.
Jesus hates uncertainty
Republican[s]
Members of the permanent majority irrespective of the popular vote.
Holder[s] of the sacred texts, the light shining in the darkness, only they are allowed to speak the holy words 'No' and 'filibuster'. The keepers of conservative wisdom. Such wisdom cannot fail it can only be failed by those of little faith.
Note: St Ronnie brought the sacred texts to earth he will arise again to lead us into the light, failing that Sarah Palin might do the trick.
PS. 'The Knights of No' have asked for a shrubbery, Jeb said to be out of the running.
Socialism
No idea what this means but it is the ultimate evil. However it can be overcome by waving little plastic flags with made in China on the back, and sucking on teabags.
Probably derived from social hence it must be against our individual rights to get what we can even if it is someone else's. Hence it is Un-American.
Tax[es]
Not needed.
Everything would be better off in the private sector look at the success of private health care. Who needs police and fire depts all can be assured by the corporations, as for the military Xe will provide.
Just picture toll booths every half mile, and every highway named after St Ronnie, now you know what heaven will look like.
University.
Veritable house of iniquity run by liberals designed to suck the very life force from our great nation. Well known for disseminating the falsehoods of science and a breeding ground for lawyers. Huge repositories of evil can be found in the libraries.
All truth and wisdom can be found in the Bible all else is sacrilege.
Virgin.
Result of abstinence only program signified by wearing a ring. As long as you don't take the ring off you are a virgin, its the symbol that counts.
Note: Having a baby whilst being a virgin can be somewhat difficult to explain and can tend to lead to founding a new religion. So caution is advised [no contraception is permissible] so next time you see a cross remember it could be your fault next time.
World [the]
Disposable commodity.
Xenomorph[s]
Liberal child[ren] as featured in 'Alien' that is why you must home school your child[ren]. Dr[sic] Dobson wrote an excellent guide on how to bring up a repressed individual and should be used by all caring parents. Memorising the bible is not advised at this stage as it will only lead to confrontation with your preacher. The correct interpretation will be given later based on the wedge issue of the day.
Youth
To be told to 'Get off the lawn'.
Young republicans make useful cannon fodder to upset as many people as possible in the shortest possible time. Release into Universities for maximum distraction.
Zealot
What we all aspire to be. Praise Jesus.