Turmoil has engulfed the
American Republic. The provision of
health care to all citizens is in dispute.
Hoping to resolve the matter
with a Senate filibuster, the greedy Health Insurance industry
has invested $1.4 million a day in lobbying and
blockaded any hopes of a Public Option.
While the congress of the
Republic endlessly debates
this alarming chain of events,
the President has
secretly dispatched two
White House Staff members, the guardians of
peace and justice in the
galaxy, to settle the conflict....
SCENE 1:
Viceroy Baucus: What, the President has sent Rahm Emanuel and Kathleen Selebius to do some arm twisting?
Kent Conrad: I knew it!
Viceroy Baucus: I must contact Lord Grassley.
Hologram of mysterious shadowy Darth Grassley. "Yes?"
Kent Conrad: This scheme of yours has failed. We dare not go against Rahm Emanuel.
Darth Grassley: Viceroy Baucus, I don't want this stunted slime in my sight again. This turn of events is unfortunate. We must accelerate our plans. Kill the Public Option immediately.
Viceroy Baucus: My lord, is that politically wise?
Darth Grassley: I will MAKE IT politically wise.
Viceroy Baucus: As you wish my lord. And Rahm Emanuel and Selebius?
Darth Grassley: Send them back to the White House immediately!