After reading this rec-listed diary, titled "Rape is Rape - No Matter Who Does It"; I couldn't be left with anything but a bitter taste in my mouth.
This kind of thinking leads down a dangerous line and I don't like the implications.
First off, unless Polanski lied in his confession, there is no excuse for what he did. The purpose of this diary is not to raise a question of whether or not Polanski is a rapist/monster/human being saintetc.
Remember, sexual misconduct covers an entire spectrum of crimes, much like homicide/assault (and similar in their spectra of severity).
The purpose of this diary is to provoke discussion about the reality that rape is different than sexual abuse is different than sexual misconduct is different than following-day misgivings.
One of the big problems I have with the way rape is discussed everywhere I have seen it
I have a serious problem with painting bad-idea type sexual encounters as 'rape'. I hear too often the 90 degree arguments thrown back and forth of "are you saying she asked for it?" pitted against "are you saying that a woman who mounts a man who is tied up but is saying 'no no' is being raped by the man?"
By the same token, I have a serious problem with the fact that it is so hard to actually get results in so many cases of unquestionable monstrous brutality. It is as if the devil itself designed the crime; intensely personal, intensely private, and so emotionally scarring as to delay evidence collection to the point that modern law enforcement has a hard time dealing with it.
And none of that even touches on spousal abuse, marital rape, child molestation vs caregiver abuse, and others I can't think of at the moment.
Yuck.
The only thing I can think of is this:
The word rape, if it is used in an overbroad context, is not specific. It is like the word 'terrorist'; it has horrible connotations, and is used with too broad a brush to paint people as 'bad'. The problem now is that it has lost too much meaning; instead of being a useful identifier for people doing monstrous things for political ends, people now wear t shirts that proclaim "proud right-wing terrorist". At the same time, we make jokes about the creepy guy in the cubicle down the hall looking like 'the office rapist'.
Let's use specific language appropriate to the crime. Many alcohol mediated college hookups fall into the category of 'sexual misconduct'. Let's reserve rape for where the term is deserved (such as what Roman Polanski did).
***update***
Tweaked the diary wording to eliminate possible confusion. Nowhere in this diary am I suggesting RP did anything other than rape.