It is, after all, exhausting work standing at the head of a continental revolution, and who could expect Chavez to turn over every counterrevolutionary rock to discover every manifestation of yanqui hegemony? But somehow, our man in Caracas has discovered the true source of counterrevolutionary energy: golf.
As reported in Saturday's Washington Post.
Nationalizing oil companies, telecommunications, electricity, construction firms, even cattle farms: standard issue. But in an act of true revolutionary creativity, we seem poised to see the nationalization of - golf courses! Those hotbeds of counterrevolutionary activity - coups plotted on the 19th hole, perhaps? "Is this a sport of the people?" he intones, and I realize wistfully that I've been expelled from the ranks of -- the people.
And today comes the news that, in a fit of irritation, Chavez has stolen a Hilton hotel, begging the question: what will become of the resort's golf course?
My suggestion is that our President appoint Tiger Woods ambassador to Venezuela, so that our Bolivarian leader will come to realize that this is one international threat without fangs, and that he can sleep comfortably somewhere between the front and back nines.