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Frank Rich and others are way off base. President Obama is not like Tiger Woods. He's just like Jon Gosselin. He's on the TV all the time and, when I voted for him, I thought I was marrying a faithful hot dude. Instead, all I'm left with are horrendous stretch marks.

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No, no, wait, Obama is like Heidi and Spencer Pratt and we're everyone on The Hills. He used us for his own 15 minutes of fame and our national reality TV show got canceled.

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Wait, hold on, I've got it! Obama is like the parents of the Balloon Boy and we're the Balloon Boy. He made us pretend that the country was in trouble and then stuck us in the political attic!

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How about Obama's Levi Johnston and we're Sarah Palin and we made Obama everything he is today - a soft core porn artist who doesn't pay child support!

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Ooh, ooh - Obama is like the Salahis and he's crashed our fantasy state dinner!

Wait, I've got it - Obama is Carrie Prejean and we're Perez Hilton and we've been told he only believes in opposite marriage!

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Maybe, just maybe, Obama is Lindsey Lohan and he's getting high and becoming a lesbian!

Hmmm, just give me a few more chances. I know I'll get this comparison right...

Originally posted to John Campanelli on Sat Dec 19, 2009 at 10:12 PM PST.

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