Washington, D.C. - Citizens across the land looked on in envy and WANT as President Obama gave his daughter a pony for Christmas. From the progressive and left flanks of the Democratic Party, grumbles could be heard about how Obama had also promised them a pony last year.
"I remember Obama said when he was President, he would finally solve how to get a pony onto Santa Claus's sled, a feat former President Bush said was 'in possible'," stated Clara Fughton of Seattle, Washington, who traveled across the country to see the pony frolic across the White House lawn. "I distinctly remembering Obama promising us a pony under every Christmas tree during the campaign, not just his."
While most of the left flank looked into their stockings in disgust at the coal and switches, the right flank had issues with the pony itself.
"It is fiscally irresponsible for the President to give his daughter a pony while in the White House," grumbled Senator DeMint, South Carolina-R. "Is Obama expecting the tax payers to pay for pony riding school, a stable and the various currying brushes a proper pony needs? Correct me if I am wrong, but no where in the Constitution is there a clause about getting a pony, much less a Santa Clause."
President Obama brushed aside the various critism, saying every American will be covered by his program for a Single Pony Option by Christmas 2014.
"By pooling our pony desires into a national pool, I promise every American will find the joy my daughter found this Christmas morning. If we reform our pony distribution network, we will have universal pony care by the end of my second term," President Obama said while bridling up the pony for an overly excited Sasha.
"No longer will Americans have to hope and make believe in ponies. Though I never campaigned on the Pony Option, I will effect that change to make sure a Princess Buttercup or Silver Star will be trotting into everyone's life soon."
As Sasha trotted around the east lawn, President Obama smiled to the crowd of enraged progressives demanding a pony of their own, right this very second, saying, "They see her riding, they are hatin'. I guess this wouldn't be the best time to tell America I got Michelle a narwal made of bacon."
As of press time, there was no word if Cheney still planned to ride out of his undisclosed mountain lair to steal Christmas from the Obamas and the rest of America, including every pony in the land.