Let's have a little chat, shall we?
Over the course of the last few days this community has been deeply affected by the diaries of Florida4Obama and her heroic efforts in giving her nephew refuge in his hour of need. And because this story revolves around his outing in a religious school and the subsequent actions taken by his parents due to their skewed religious views, the comment sections of these diaries have turned to discussions of punishment for the parents and the school and the vilification of religion in general.
As someone who was raised as a fundamentalist and had a crisis of faith in my teens that turned into an abrupt and permanent estrangement from organized religion, I have to tell you that I think you all should shut the hell up in the comment section of those diaries about all things religious.
I'm not going to discuss the details of my estrangement with organized religion because it's unimportant to the topic at hand. Nor will I discuss what it is I believe now because that is also unimportant to the topic at hand, although someday I might go there. But what I will tell you is that when something happens that disrupts the belief system that you've had your whole life at such a critical age it is a traumatizing experience in and of itself.
But this young man has much more going on than that. He's been outed. He's been thrown out of his home and told he cannot return. He's been made to feel dirty and despised. So he needs some love and encouragement, for sure.
But what he doesn't need is a bunch of know-it-alls telling him that his belief system, as fucked up as it may be, is stupid and that people who believe as he does deserve to be punished for their beliefs. And you may not think that's what you're saying, but trust me, I'm the voice of experience here, and that's what he's going to hear.
Sure, you guys may be right and their is no God or spirits or souls or whatever. We're all just worm food. When we're gone, we're gone. That's all fine and dandy.
But this kid really doesn't need to hear that right now. He needs support and encouragement to just move forward and not give up on life. His aunt is taking the right approach by taking him to a new church that may be more accepting. He really needs to hold on to the spiritual right now, because that gives him comfort. It is something personal and familiar, and he desperately needs that right now. There's an old spiritual titled "Take Your Burdens to the Lord and Leave Them There." He needs to be able to do that right now, even if there really isn't a God out there to hear him.
But beyond that, you are risking alienating this child against principles that we'd like him to embrace. If someone tells you that what you believe is stupid, what is your reaction likely to be? More importantly, what kind of reaction do you think a teenager is going to have?
He's going to at the very least think, if not say, "Who the fuck heck do you think you are, you condescending asshat bully?"
Every time you make a disparaging remark about religion in those diaries right now, you are slapping that kid in the face, whether you realize that or not. That is NOT what he needs to hear right now. He needs to hear that being gay is normal and healthy and that we are here to support him in learning to embrace who he really is. What he does with the religion thing will get ironed out down the road. I suspect that he will hold on to some aspect of religion, but maybe not. Maybe someday soon he'll be ready to discuss with a bunch of aggressive atheists why his faith is not valid and you can persuade him with some eloquent logic. But that day is not today.
All of you making comments in those diaries about how religion is evil and stupid and his parents should be punished in some way should bring that shit over here or to an open thread somewhere, but stop doing it there where he'll be reading. Seriously. Take the comment section of this diary and just make all the most horrible comments you can come up with about religion. You religious folks come right on in and slug it out, too, if you want. Let's all have pie! Right here! Right now! If you want to aim it directly at me, I'm good with that. I'm old enough and have enough experience with this place to handle incoming pie from all quarters.
But leave the kid be for the time being.