So, I was nearly run off the road once. And I was called a slur once.
You see, I'm gay and disabled and one of those elicited both namecalling and attempted rear ending of my truck. It's pretty strange that in this country in 2010 anything would make someone so angry but neither of those things are especially damaging to someone else. And not annoying enough to warrant an attempted auto accident.
In the recent months we've seen a driver rear-ended for an Obama sticker and racist and homophobic attacks on legislators. A doctor is refusing to see "Democratic" (i.e. African American, Asian, Latin American, GLBT, female, disabled) patients. Some states are passing laws to ban implementation of health care reform.
With the Westboro Baptist Church doing their antigay thing and the Catholic Church refusing to do charity work in areas that allow gay marriage, and the fifteen year long need to pass hate crimes legislation for GLBT Americans that finally happened this year, you won't guess which of my two differences caused such hate.
A few years ago I was driving home from my mom's house at night. I'm a really cautious driver. I didn't get my license until I was nineteen because I had to learn how to use a hand controlled vehicle and it wasn't awesome.
I drive a little slower than others but I pay attention to what I'm doing. Part of the reason for that is when I get in my truck I have a wheelchair lift that swings around and picks the chair up, carrying it around to the back of the truck. Since it stands up in the back of the truck I have to look around it to see things behind me more clearly.
My wheelchair is also completely visible to anyone around me, since it's just standing there in the back of the truck attached to an enormous wheelchair lift.
I'm very careful about making sure I can see. And since I have hand controls and I need one hand on the gas and one hand on the wheel at all times, I don't talk on the phone or text while driving.
So, there I was driving home in the pitch black minding my own damn business when a car came up behind me with its brights on. It was so close I couldn't see anything but lights in all my mirrors so I figured maybe I was going too slow. I sped up. This person got even closer, still with their brights on.
They were obviously following me - the route I take made it obvious that if they wanted to go any other way they could.
Almost home, I started to get really freaked out. They were so close but they never tried to pass me. I didn't even know if I should get out of my truck at my apartment or drive around for awhile until they got bored. Then they bumped the back of my truck.
So THAT scared me even more. Okay, I've got tons of anxiety problems anyway. I am on medication and I have some serious issues. This wasn't a moment where I thought "what a fucker" - this was paralyzing fear.
I was convinced this person was going to cause me to wreck off the road and then possibly attack me. This was strange because I don't even talk to anyone! I don't have friends here nor any enemies. People know who I am because my mom knows everyone but other than that I'm not known for anything worthy of this sort of activity.
Eventually I was almost home and this person stopped in the middle of the road and turned around. Inexplicably. They decided they'd had enough fun I guess and went off to scare someone else.
As soon as I pulled into the parking spot I locked the door and called the cops. Maybe that was extreme since the person had already turned around but as I said I am dealing with issues many others are not.
The cop came and I explained the situation. I didn't really think they'd know what was up and he'd reassure me that it was just some prank and I needed to stop being a dork. That's not what happened. He told me that, yes, it's not unexpected. I have a wheelchair in the back of my truck so people can see I'm disabled.
He said they get calls "all the time" from disabled people who are run off the road or otherwise "pranked" because, I guess, it's a lot of fun to terrorize disabled people. I don't understand this mentality at all and even as someone who's been disabled one way or another for my whole life I would have never expected a cop to tell me bluntly that this sort of thing happens all the time to disabled people.
I don't know if it's regional - I live in a rural area and people are bored - or if this happens everywhere. I just know that until that point I'd always worried about being gay bashed but I never suspected I'd be bashed for THIS. Of course neither are worthy of that, I just wrongly assumed disabilities were more accepted than being GLBT here in Alabama.
Now I always watch out for some stupid people trying to have a little bit of fun at my expense. If they only knew about my anxiety problems they'd probably stop - I'm less anxious and less of a danger than I was a few years ago but I'm still on medication for anxiety.
It's sort of like in high school. I was always worried about being gay bashed so I never came out in high school. I was friends with most of the gay kids there and wasn't ashamed or nervous about admitting that I think GLBT people are the same as anyone else, but I never came out.
One time at lunch I sat with a friend at a table that a bunch of strangers decided to hijack. I was talking to the friend, and suddenly some guy said to her "Tell that fucking cripple to SHUT UP!" He couldn't even address me. It was bizarre. I never got gay bashed in high school and even now that I'm out nobody says anything to my face.
But everyone's cool with bashing me for my disability.
It's a strange place we live in.