From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE...
[Thwooooot!!!] "Great Orange Satan Turns 8"
Stumbling onto a still-functioning link to Kos's very first DK entry---posted May 26, 2002---almost feels like an archaeological discovery. (You can read it but please don’t touch it...it's very brittle and your screen might crumble.) But it's his second post that started setting the tone for this place:
Embarrassing
Bush and Putin on nickname terms
Pootie-Poot? Is our 'president' in second grade? I dream of once
again having a grownup running the country. Sigh...
America's collective response to Daily Kos's debut back then: "Holy shit! This is the start of an online revolution that will change the very nature of grassroots activism, raising gajillions of dollars for candidates and affecting public policy in the halls of state capitals and Washington D.C. itself!" Not. More like [crickets].
Thinking back to when I first started lurking here is like trying to conjure my earliest memory from childhood---it's a wee bit fuzzy. Like many old-timers, I followed a link from the Dean for America blog to this place sometime in mid-'03 (I think). I wasn't even close to being active politically, but Bush's worst-case-scenario-come-true presidency forced me to start paying attention. Plus I loved gettin' my weekly fix of hot Dem-on-Dem Cattle Call action.
I didn’t read those early posts---I inhaled them. They were (and still are) sharply-written outside-the-DC-beltway analyses and opinions and dot-connections that the traditional media were missing or ignoring, at a time when Judith Miller's breathless Iraq WMD "reporting" and Colin Powell's vial of baby powder ruled our world. I knew so little back then about primaries, caucuses, economics, framing, environmental issues, cloture (which I'd always thought was Klingon for "My apologies for blowing chunks in your escape pod"), and the saints and sinners in Congress. This place enlightened and continues to enlighten me, which is why today I never blog without wearing a mortarboard.
Kos moved to the Scoop system in October, 2003 (in part because "Flame wars were getting out of hand"), giving us the sweet nectar of polls, troll-rating and mojo. Soon we'll be getting acquainted with the next iteration. But whatever the technological changes, the heart and soul of this place will always be you---that is to say, us---the unruly roomful of 243,237 concerned cats (source: jotter) that only a danged fool would try to herd. I want to gay marry each and every one of you.
And to you, O Kingpin, My Kingpin, from user ID #2574: Happy Blogiversary, Kos. And at the risk of sounding like a total suckup: I [heart] your ties.
Cheers and Jeers starts in There's Moreville... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Note: Our sincerest apologies for not warning the Daily Kos community in advance that we were changing from jeans to shorts yesterday morning. Those of you who suffered retina burn as a result of viewing our blindingly-white birdlegs without proper protection can submit a claim (legitimate claims only!) in care of BP's legal department. They'll get riiiiight on it.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til summer: 26
Days `til the Tupelo Elvis Festival in Mississippi: 9
Age at which daily stress and worry begins to decrease significantly: 50
(Source: Gallup study of 340,000 Americans, via Time)
Number of U.S. troops hospitalized in 2009 for, respectively, mental-health issues and physical injuries: 17,538 / 11,156
Number of other years in the past 15 when the first number has been higher than the second number: 0
(Source: USA Today)
Value of the 1794 Michael Bolton silver dollar: $7.85 million
Other coins in the world that are more valuable: 0
(Source: Coin Update News)
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Mid-week Rapture Index: 173 (including 5 "Wild Weathers" and...Holy shit! Better make that six). Soul Protection Factor 24 lotion is recommended---and a steel umbrella---if you’ll be walking amongst the heathen today.
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Newest member of Team Jacob
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CHEERS to pre-get-together get-togethers. Mary Rickles at Netroots Nation adjusts her hoop skirt, dips her quill in the satiny indigo ink, signs her name, adds a smiley face, gently seals the envelope with candle wax, and sends it via horseback courier to your attention...
As we continue to gear up for the Netroots Nation convention in Las Vegas this July, I wanted to make sure you knew about another conference happening in June. The Campaign for America's Future, one of our long-standing institutional progressive allies in Washington, is hosting its annual America's Future Now conference of progressive leaders, thinkers and organizers June 7-9. I'm going, and if you're able to, I hope you can join me. Rep. Nancy Pelosi, Bill Moyers, Arianna Huffington, Rep. Alan Grayson, Rep. Donna Edwards, Richard Trumka, Markos Moulitsas and more will also be there.
Click here to register and secure your spot at America's Future Now at a special Netroots Nation price.
...and then waits by the window, gazing at the setting sun, unaware that her adventure is just beginning. But one thing she knows already: she's burning this damn corset in the back yard at sunrise. THE END.
JEERS to Big Fucking Oil Spill. Today's sermon: God, I don’t know what you were smokin', sniffin', drinkin' or poppin' when you made us, but it's pretty clear by now that you were, at a minimum, distracted. Boston Globe columnist Derrick Jackson:
USA Today reported on how little research has been devoted to dealing with a spill that begins 5,000 feet underwater. The newspaper quoted a BP spokesman as saying that the company "doesn’t specifically’’ research oil spill response technologies. Instead, BP relies on oil spill response companies, such as Marine Spill Response, based in Virginia. But the spokeswoman for that company told USA Today that it has no budget for research. The newspaper wrote, "the basic equipment and tactics being used: boom, dispersants, burns and use of skimmer boats to pick up the oil haven’t changed much in the two decades since the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska."
Things have gotten so ugly that when asked if the spill should be blamed on the gays, the feminists or the pagans, even Pat Robertson responded: "Oh, this is effing BP all the way."
P.S. Today BP may saddle up and try something new (or, more specifically, something old that hasn't been tried on this particular spill yet). It's called Top Kill. What happens is, you force-feed a bunch of cement into the hole until it stops spewing the nasty shit. If it works on the pipe they'll give it a go on Glenn Beck.
CHEERS to the noble end of an illustrious career. The Space Shuttle Atlantis is due to land at the Kennedy Space Center any old time now. (By the time you read this it might have touched down already, especially if you're reading this in 2097.) It'll then be towed to a Florida retirement community where, with its stretchy pants up to its nipples, it will meet and fall in love with a widowed B-52, and enjoy a life of croquet, pilates, golf and travel. Fair warning kids: if it ever asks you to pull its wing, make sure you're wearing something fireproof.
JEERS to turning a corner...and running into a wall. This little exchange tells you everything you need to know about the quagmire in Afghanistan:
Army Gen. Stanley McChrystal, the top allied military commander in Afghanistan, sat gazing at maps of Marjah as a Marine battalion commander asked him for more time to oust Taliban fighters from a longtime stronghold in southern Afghanistan's Helmand province.
"You've got to be patient," Lt. Col. Brian Christmas told McChrystal. "We've only been here 90 days."
"How many days do you think we have before we run out of support by the international community?" McChrystal replied.
A charged silence settled in the stuffy, crowded chapel tent at the Marine base in the Marjah district. "I can't tell you, sir," the tall, towheaded, Fort Bragg, N.C., native finally answered.
When, after eight years, your military operations become a Monty Python sketch, it's probably time for Plan B: as in "Bail."
CHEERS to sweet libation. Eighty years ago, in 1930, the Supreme Court ruled that buying liquor does not violate the Constitution. Afterward they reached for the flasks strapped to their shins and toasted their fine work. It's 5 O'clock somewhere---bottom's up!
JEERS to crossword puzzle-style government. Honestly now. I could handle the wild late-night orgies between oil company employees and members of the Minerals Management Service, but really...this is just too much:
Federal regulators responsible for oversight of drilling in the Gulf of Mexico allowed industry officials several years ago to fill in their own inspection reports in pencil---and then turned them over to the regulators, who traced over them in pen before submitting the reports to the agency, according to an inspector general’s report to be released this week.
The report, which describes inappropriate behavior by the staff at the Minerals Management Service from 2005 to 2007, also found that inspectors had accepted meals, tickets to sporting events and gifts from at least one oil company while they were overseeing the industry.
Memo to historians: this shall henceforth be known as George W. Bush's Teapot Dome Scandal. Warren G. Harding welcomes the company.
CHEERS to activist Danes. Twenty-one years ago today, Denmark became the first country in the world to legalize gay marriage. Crazy sinners---don't they know these relationships only tend to last for 46 years?
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Five years ago in C&J: May 26, 2005
While we were all fixated on nuclear options, evil judges and car bombs, a miracle happened right under our noses. From Kossack 'Plane Crazy'...
"The short synopsis is that 9 weeks ago we went from "Some concern but we'll watch it" to "60% chance your baby will not develop lungs and will not be able to breath when he's born. If he can, then there's a 20% chance he'll have horrible physical deformities and severe lung problems." Then the news got bad, it went to finally 90-some-percent chance the baby would die.
We agonized over continuing to carry a baby who would certainly die. We decided to continue. We're both 41 and this is our one and only chance to have a kid and we thought that as long as there's just that small percent we'd give him that chance.
After an exciting weekend of contractions, no contractions, contractions again, I am pleased to announce a Super Mega Double Whammo Cheer for Nathaniel James. Born at 29 weeks and 2 days...2lbs 13oz...13.25 inches long
He just keeps getting stronger and stronger and is completely off any assisted breathing. He's gaining weight and fussing up a storm...and surprising the hell out of everyone including the professionals."
In my book, that's the story of the week.
[5/26/10 Update: PlaneCrazy gave me an update last night via email: "We had a big blowout of a birthday where we rented an old train for a ride. It was a blast. Nate and his friends had a grand old time. He is pretty special and will always be the first official baby of C&J." Awesome.]
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And just one more...
CHEERS to snappy answers to vexing problems. I've been culling through commencement addresses looking for useful nuggets of advice for the Class of Twenty Ten, and given the current state of hysteria over immigration, I thought Stephen Colbert's 2006 speech at Knox College might offer some enlightenment:
"[W]hen you enter the work force, you will find competition from those crossing our all-too-poorest borders. Now I know you're all going to say, "Stephen, Stephen, immigrants built America." Yes, but here's the thing---it's built now. I think it was finished in the mid-70s sometime. At this point it's a touch-up and repair job. But thankfully Congress is acting and soon English will be the official language of America. Because if we surrender the national anthem to Spanish, the next thing you know, they'll be translating the Bible. God wrote it in English for a reason! So it could be taught in our public schools.
"So we must build walls. A wall obviously across the entire southern border. That's the answer. That may not be enough---maybe a moat in front of it, or a fire-pit. Maybe a flaming moat, filled with fire-proof crocodiles. And we should probably wall off the northern border as well. Keep those Canadians with their socialized medicine and their skunky beer out. And because immigrants can swim, we'll probably want to wall off the coasts as well.
"And while we're at it, we need to put up a dome, in case they have catapults. And we'll punch some holes in it so we can breathe. Breathe free. It's time for illegal immigrants to go---right after they finish building those walls."
Having read the above, the "Papers, please" crowd is no doubt working on the blueprint sketches.
Have a nice Wednesday. Be sure to take some time out for thunkin'! Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
Pill may stop Cheers and Jeers addiction, rewire brain
---AP
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