Hello, and Welcome to Great Moments in American History!!, the diary where we look into that vast tome of awesomeness known as the history of teh United States of America and highlight some of the events that serve as a model to today's lawmakers.
Today in GMIAH!!, The Congress. The legislative branch of the government, so important its rules are enumerated in Article I of the Constitution. Join us now, as we take a glimpse at the past.
December, 1939. Invasion. The Japanese bombing of Pearl Harbor destroying all of the United States' Pacific Fleet save the aircraft carriers followed quickly by a declaration of war from Nazi Germany leaves the country reeling. Congress responds almost immediately by doing nothing. Thanks to the quick thinking of our boys in the dome, the American Free Market quickly mobilizes the country for war. Buy stuff at the mall, they proudly proclaimed, and stimulate our economy to victory!
July, 1968. Reconstruction. Violence against negroes in the South and rampant disenfranchisement in the state legislatures, the country is once again in danger of slipping into legal apartheid. The Congress heroically pulls off a legislative maneuver that still brings freedom to oppressed minorities today, doing nothing. Almost instantly the invisible hand of the free market swept through the South like rainbow on a motorcycle, teaching everyone that the value of a hard working man is worth equal amounts of money and respect regardless of skin-color.
April, 1948. The war-torn nations of Europe falling deeper into debt and despair, the entire world threatens once again to fall into poverty rueld by despots. The U.S. Congress, acting on behalf of one of the only nations unscathed by the battles, bravely elects to do nothing. Chastened mightily by our lack of charity, the civilized nations of the world immediately follow our example and pull themselves up by their bootstraps through debt reduction and lowering taxes.
And so on.