I have been waffling back and forth over the last few years over whether to apply for naturalization. I hail from Canada, spent the first 31 years of my life there, moved to the US for what I assumed would be a temporary stay and ended up marrying an American.
The process of adjusting my status and obtaining my green card was complicated by communication issues and my local office was not run by warm friendly people. Once while getting my picture taken for my work permit, the documentation required to work legally while awaiting for adjustment of status and obtaining the green card, I noted my local office had files strewn all over the place. I asked if the office was undergoing some move or re-organization and got a sarcastic reply. I pointed out that people's lives were in those files and that if something went missing it had enormous consequences. I got the evil eye/stink eye in response. Then there were delays with my application as it got moved around the country because my local office was backed up. Something suddenly went missing from my file and I got a nasty phone call telling me my file would be discontinued. Lucky my local congressman's office was well versed in providing assistance. We got the issue resolved and I received my green card.
The experience left me rather leery about continuing through the process. The INS scared me a bit. You have to be a green card holder for a specified amount of time before applying for naturalization and once I became eligible I dragged my feet. Did I really want to become an American citizen? Did I really want to deal with the INS? In reality, I would have to form a relationship with them again to re-new my green card.
Seeing Obama become elected gave me a bit of hope. While I never saw him and still don't as a knight in shining armor or even a true friend to progressives, I thought huh maybe Americans are guided by reason. Sorry. Eight years of Bush II made me seriously question that. It wasn't a fair assessment, I know.
Watching the tea bagger rallies, cringing at their vocal hatred and distain of anybody or anything they deem different and then a weird encounter with one at work pushed me to do the deed and apply for naturalization. Since I am in a supervisory position at work I actively avoid political discussions. I don't want to be seen as advancing an agenda especially since I am aware that my views are not the same as the majority of people I work with. But I found myself literally cornered by a tea bagger who aggressively questioned me in front of other people. The more I resisted answering her questions the louder she became. She was frantic with anger. Finally, I calmly informed her that I did not share her views but believed firmly that we all had a right to express them. I also shared with her that if I wanted to convert somebody to my cause I would probably not freak out on my audience. I told her that I was pro-choice, that I was in favor of gay marriage, health care reform, and a whole host of other things that she asserted were evil and she was wasting her time telling me that our President was the devil himself and my primary focus at that time was to do my job and maybe she should think about doing hers as well. I said all of this in front of people who pretty much shared her views. She muttered under her breath and scuttled away and the audience watching all this were weirdly supportive of me. None of them agreed with me but they were disturbed by her approach. The next time I saw this person taking a patient down for a stat X-Ray we both just acted like it never happened.
But that was the push I needed. The Tea Baggers aren't apologizing for their views why should I have to soften mine?
Now living in Tennessee makes my voting choices for state/local races ultimately rest between tweedle dee and tweedle dum. You can vote for the ultra conservative "best friends with Jesus" Republican and the ultra conservative "best friends with Jesus" Democratic candidate. I am not bashing Christians. I think Jesus was an awesome guy and if we actually listened to some of his advice we might be ever so slightly more compassionate to one another. I do not consider myself a Christian but in this state most people are. I am less than thrilled by the way he gets appropriated for political gain.
In applying now, I am hoping to be able to at least vote in 2012 maybe sooner if the process unfolds as quickly as it is supposed to and I have fewer road blocks than I did the last time. Do I think Obama is perfect. No. Do I think he engages in some triangulation at times? Yes. But I can't stand by and let a Tea Bagger/Republican candidate win the presidency in 2012 either. And if one does win in 2012 at least I will be able to say I did not vote for them. I don't want to hand the United States to the crazies on a platter and give them permission to make life worse for ordinary Americans. I am tired of every ill and complication being blamed on the "gay agenda" or the illegal immigrants or the "liberals" some other group defined by the right as the "other" those whole are somehow not the "correct" Americans.
The only way I can see to counter that and have a clear conscience about living here and enjoying the freedoms however flawed some of it often all is will be to become American myself.
I can completely understand why some, especially gay Americans have and will continue to contemplate leaving for a place where they are treated equally. I am in no position to offer advice since like all straight people I have a special privilege, an entitlement not extended. I am a health care worker not a constitutional expert but it isn't entirely clear to me how we can all have the right to "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" when some of us can get married and adopt children and some of us can't.
Wish me luck and if all goes well I will be out there exercising my rights.