After 22 weeks, I'm finally employed. Yep, got a job with the Palin '12 campaign. Have to say it's the easiest job I've ever had. Just called the World VHS Convention and told them we had to cancel, Piper wants to see the Justin Bieber show in Birmingham. Perfect! That's where the real people live!
Other than that, only had a few other duties. Already got my wrist slapped for suggesting we vet Chuck Norris for a possible VP candidate. He's a Texas Ranger, I'm told, do you really think he doesn't know how to follow the law? Nothing to do for the rest of the day, Todd has told us Sarah is trying to compose a Facebook message saying she knows the difference between North and South Korea (hint: one of them didn't bomb us in World War II. Duh).
Todd also wrote us an explicit email, saying:
u guy's need to give Sarah a brake, she's tired of u guy's not going to bat for her against the lamestream media. Remember, she's the boss
I do remember, do you think I'm going to complain about my 39 1/2 hours (even if it is 50)?
All right, Missy is bringing in the Mickey Dees, gotta go, LOL.
Yeah. What we're saying is these groups perpetrate hate—just like those organizations do.
—SPLC research director Heidi Beirich, when asked if a Republican addressing the FRC convention is the same as addressing the Aryan Nation, due to the FRC's anti gay stance.
We call on the Southern Poverty Law Center to apologize for this slanderous attack and attempted character assassination.
—Character assassins Family Research Council.
So I think in a lame duck setting Don't Ask, Don't Tell is not going anywhere.
—Sen. Lindsay Graham (R, SC).
Is that about himself or the military?
I’ll never forgive the Bush administration and Paulson for basically destroying the last vestige of fiscal responsibility that we had in the Republican Party. After that, I don’t know how we ever make the tough choices.
—Former Reagan budget director David Stockman.
It’s a triumphal mosque. Because one shmuck in New York says “it’s a mosque of healing” doesn’t make it so.
—shrill blogger Pam Gellar.
Because one schmuck says it's a triumphal mosque doesn't make it so, either.
It is very important for ordinary citizens, who have no direct interest in maintaining the status quo, to take part in a constitutional review.
—Iceland Prime Minister Johanna Sigurdardotti, about Iceland's public election for constitutional assembly members who will write their constitution.
In TX for M.Latrell wedding. If a husband forgot the garment bag in NYC that had the dress his wife was going to wear tonight, is he dead?
—Glenn Beck, on Twitter.
You mean to say you are hocking a year's worth of apocalyptic survival food and you can't even plan for the weekend?
Until the Southern Poverty Law Center adds the FDA and the CDC to its list of 'hate' groups, there is no reason to think that either the AFA or the FRC belongs on that list. In point of fact, we are 'truth' groups, not 'hate' groups.
—AFA's Bryan Fischer, who blames the Holocaust on a homosexual agenda by the Nazis.
The truth is, you're a hate group.
It would be wonderful if President [George H.W.] Bush would come out for the treaty. That would be so powerful and definitely help.
—Sen. Susan Collins (R, ME)
Every living Secretary of State from both parties has come out for the treaty.
I hate CNN and I wish you hadn’t brought that up.
—Don Imus, to Sen. Joe Lieberman (I, CT), on his radio show.
They then french kissed Fox News.
I lived in periods where capital gains taxes were 39.6 percent, when earned income taxes were 70 percent, and our economy did just fine.
—Billionaire Warren Buffett.
Basically, she had nothing. She knew what she didn't like about Obama, she knew what other people didn't like, and she knew her principles, but the details of what government should do—well, that was tricky.
—Dave Weigel on Sarah Palin's new book.
Still after 30 years of being together, Todd and I get our most thrill out of getting away from it all, gettin' out of Wasilla, you know where it's so hectic here and going about 70 miles up north to our cabin in Petersville.
—Sarah Palin to Gretchen Carlson about their favorite date place.
Wasilla (pop. 10,256). Nothing more needs to be said.
I remember that a guy named Ronald Reagan used to be viewed by some as divisive.
—Sen. John McCain (R, AZ), about Sarah Palin.
Used to?
Cowherd thinks Mrs. Doubtfire is the funniest movie ever -- that makes me more qualified than him to talk about anything at all. I mean anything -- physics, dessert recipes, the Carolingian dynasty, lesbian relationships, anything. Okay? Can we stop with the letters on this guy already?
—Matt Taibbi on Colin Cowherd, who Taibbi blasted on his NFL union stance.
As the immortal Marisa Tomei said in My Cousin Vinny, ‘that’s a bullshit question!’ because you cannot pluck people out of the past and expect them to comment on what’s happening today.
—Edmund Morris to Bob Schieffer when asked what Teddy Roosevelt would think about the Tea Party movement.
Quote the Ravin', a weekly roundup of quotes from around the internets, comes out every Tuesday around lunchtime. Today, it's a late lunch. Brunch. Dinner, whatever.