Thus wrote the bard blue aardvark.
Sore oppressed was the land of USA
Beset on all sides the folk thereof
Beset they were, but not bereft of hope of change
For a new Lord had they, and he spoke of hope
Beset they were by dragons avaricious
Which stole their jobs and took them to distant lands
Which devoured their money and excreted it into piles called "CDOs"
Which sought always greater power, and more freedom to plunder
Oppressed were they by ogres vile
Ogres which tore apart all those who were different
Ogres of diverse names and characters
Ogres alike in their hatred of The Other
Hope came to USA from the People of the Donkey
Whose armies had seized power after long exile
Whose coming brought concern to the dragons
And sent the ogres into frenzies of rage
Opposing the People of the Donkey
Were the Goposaurs
Servants of the dragons were they, though they denied it
Servants also were they of the ogres, though they protested overmuch
Led were the People by one named "BO"
A man from the western isles
Who spoke of hope, and change,
And who had led their armies to occupy the great city, DC
Who fought in the great Army of the People?
The Paladins of Purity fought on the left flank
Hot was their fury; unmatched their valor
Their battle cry "Do What's Right!"
Who fought in the great Army of the People?
The Knights of Pragmatism occupied the center
Great was their skill; cunning their tactics
Their battle cry "Win what you can!" failed to inspire
Who fought in the great Army of the People?
Those who followed the Lord BO
New to battle were many of them
And their cry of "BO Rawks!" was vaguely unsettling
Who fought, using the term loosely, in the great Army of the People?
Upon the right wing failed to advance the Blue Dogs of compromise
Their skill mainly at avoiding battle
Their non-battle cry "Don't anger the dragons! Don't upset the ogres!" was meek and barely audible
But after victory division came upon the Army of the People
The People of the Donkey did dispute among themselves
For it seemed to many that the Lord BO sided with the Knights
And let pass opportunities for great victories
For despite the seizure of DC the dragons still plundered
Against the dragon AHIP the army advanced
But AHIP survived, and continued to plunder;
Dismayed were many of the Paladins
The dragons likewise plundered the government treasuries
And funds bundled in a TARP were rendered unto them
And efforts to regain the money
Were laughed to scorn
For despite the seizure of DC the ogres still roamed
War they waged against those whose skin lacked sufficient pallor
Against those whose faith was not in Rifle Jesus
And they sought to cast these people from the land
Sought the ogres also to enslave women
Thinking them less than men, because they carried not
Between their loins the holy and sacred Tallywacker;
Sought the ogres to deny control over their bodies to women
Also the ogres continued to pursue those of different loves
Men who loved men, those light in their loafers;
Women who loved women, those in sensible shoes;
And did deny them rights most basic based on old hatreds.
So there was dismay among the Paladins, and among the Knights
Many were concerned, and sought to consolidate what had been gained
The blue dogs were fearful, as ever, and did seek accommodation
With the dragons, and betook themselves of dragon gold
And the Paladins did cry out "We are not listened to!",
And some among the Knights said to them "What matters most to you?"
And the Paladins replied with one voice
" Torture FISA GLBT rights Iraq Afghanistan public option SCOTUS "
And the Knights shook their heads, and made reply,
"What did you just say? Can you repeat that?"
And the Paladins replied with one voice
" Energy policy climate change DADT DOMA card check Down with Elena Kagan "
So there was dissension among the ranks of the People
And in this the Goposaurs took great hope, and did ready themselves
For a battle to retake the city of DC
And to once again rule over the land of USA
Surfeit were they with dragon's gold, and in their ranks
Fought many who served the ogres, and who were inflamed with hatred
Led were they by John the Orange and Mitch the Turtle and Mike the Steely
Skill they lacked, and also clues, but heartless resolve filled them
Terrible the Goposaurs! For the people of USA
Were sore confused, and many of the followers of BO
Did fall away, and the blue dogs considered in their hearts
Whether to switch sides.
And then there came a day when the People of the Donkey stopped their bickering
And they looked upon the Goposaurs, and despised them
And they looked upon each other, and remembered old bonds of friendship
And they looked upon the suffering people of USA, and loved them
And in loving the people they remembered the dragons
And they remembered the ogres
And they remembered that the Goposaurs
Were the sworn servants of these evils
Terrible the Army of the People of the Donkey!
For the Paladins rode forth in wrath;
In all directions rode they, but in all directions found they Goposaurs
Their swords smoked as they struck down the foe
Terrible the Army of the People of the Donkey!
For the Knights lifted up their eyes to achieve victories that mattered
And their advance was relentless
And Goposaurs fled before them as mice before pooties
Terrible the Army of the People of the Donkey!
For the Lord BO did bestir himself, and did call on his followers
And they advanced in their ranks
And drove the Goposaurs back in shrieking panic
Terrible the Army of the People of the Donkey!
For the blue dogs saw which way the wind blew
And they saw upon which side their bread was buttered
And they fell upon wounded Goposaurs, and dispatched them
And the Ogre SB1070 was trapped, and tied up for years
And the Ogre DADT was slain, and there was great rejoicing
And the dragons Goldman Sachs and Morgan Stanley were restrained
And some of their plundering reduced
And thus did the year 2010 end
And the sages of the Village were bemused
And the sages did dispute among themselves
How such a thing could be, that the dragons were confounded?