Libyan crazy man Moammar Gadhafi is reportedly “going ballistic” as protesters call for an end to his four-decade reign.
Col. Qaddafi, whose name is routinely spelled Gaddafi, Kadhafi, Qadhaffi, Khaddafi and countless other variations in media reports, is not only a ruthless despot – he’s also a raving schizophrenic, with at least one outlandish personality for each spelling of his name.
Sources describe him as “a real dictator’s dictator” with a fondness for mustard gas, donkey prostitutes and human oppression.
(Illustrated version)
A defiant Khaduffy has vowed to remain in power – pledging to govern his people to death if necessary.
His vow to battle protesters to the “last drop of blood” (theirs, not his obviously) sent the price of blood spiking to over $100 a barrel.
Mo’ammar Gadhafi: Impotent tyrant who hates Canada and takes orders from an imaginary unicorn.
Muhammer Kadafi: Autocratic crackhead obsessed with Kung Fu movies and “Jersey Shore.”
Muammar Qadhafi: Metrosexual sadist who enjoys snorting industrial bleach and raping underage wombats.
Moammar Khaddafi: Neo-socialist airplane-glue addict, loves setting fire to butterflies.
Mu’amar al-Ghedafi: Flamboyantly gay tyrant who addresses his genitalia as Sir Reginald and appointed it Secretary of Fornication.
Motown el-Gedoffmi: Closet Michael Jackson fanatic into shooting elephant tranquilizers and dressing his pet turtle in a military uniform.
(Click here for the illustrated version)