There isn't much left of me. I am tired. I can't remember being this tired before. Sure, I was pretty beat when each of the babies came, but I knew it would end. I knew that they would grow, and one day hold their own bottle, not need diapers, walk on their own. I don't know when this will end. My grandparents lived through the Great Depression, with no health care, and 4 kids. They were homeless for a good portion of it. Maybe they were just made of sterner stuff. My mom says that she didn't remember it as hard times, rather one big adventure. She doesn't remember being hungry, or shoeless, or living in shanty towns. I am not there yet; if I get there will my kids think it's just a great adventure? Somehow I don't think so. I'll keep working.
Some of you may know me. If not my name is Ma Kettle. I was a frequent poster before the Great Recession. I am a teacher, a mother, a wife. I make a game out of eating cheap and enjoying simple pleasures. I have a huge library of cookbooks dating back to 1915, plus Grandma Kettle who is a child of the Great Depression.
Last February I lost my part time job. I was down to just the full time job with benefits. Not so bad right? Last October my husband lost his full time job and I began to look for work. I put in for a mortgage modification to which I got no response. We started falling behind on all our bills. There were a few weeks there where I could not even buy milk. I looked more earnestly. My husband found work for about the same pay but no insurance, got laid off from that job, and found one that is 4 hours a day. The irony is that now, with my husband under employed, I could qualify for the FHA program, but I work so many jobs that I make too much money. My doctor says I should just walk away from my house and let it go into foreclosure, and find a shrink. I have lost quite a bit of weight, and developed some physical issues that no shrink can fix.
Here let's have some appetizers if you are going to read my rant.
Simple Tomato Salad
2-3 Fresh Ripe Tomatoes sliced
Any kind of olive
fresh sliced mushrooms
sliced green or red onion
sliced avocado
The best olive oil you can afford
salt, pepper, garlic powder
assemble on a plate, sprinkle with salt pepper, garlic powder, and any fresh herbs to hand. Eat with fresh bread, biscuits, good crackers, etc.
I kept looking for work and found a position as an adjunct at 4 different universities and as an online teacher for 2 high schools, while still holding down that full time job for insurance. I am so tired. Is this how crazy starts? Will I be speeding into a mack truck just to end it all? Would GW call me industrious? Man I dunno, but I do know affordable health insurance would help me out. See Pa has a rare condition which can be controlled by some expensive meds. If we could purchase health insurance in the market, I could work from home, maybe if I found another part time position. I could take care of Pa and Grandma. Not while my house is underwater and Pa is under employed though. Man, if he could just get a full time job I could give up one or two of mine. I am stuck with this dangerous position at an alternative high school just for insurance. Teachers do work for intrinsic rewards, but when there have been faculty attacked within the last 3 months it makes a teacher wonder. That doesn't even include all of the Republican "blame the teachers" BS. I mean, I must not suck too badly at what I do, or I wouldn't be working like this.
Here is one of my cheapest Chicken recipes. This would also be good if you substituted pork chops for the chicken; chicken dark meat is pretty cheap though.
Chicken and Lentils
Chicken legs and thighs
1 cup of lentils
1 chopped onion
1 1/2 cup water
1 tsp each garlic powder, Mrs. Dash, thyme, chicken boullion, tobasco
1/2 tsp pepper
Place seasonings in a 9x13 pan. Add dry lentils and water. Place well salted and peppered chicken parts on top of lentils. Cover with aluminum foil and bake for 1 hr at 350. Uncover and bake till done at 400. Serve with honeyed carrots. This makes fantastic chicken and dumplings later in the week.
The pols don't get it though. I mean, folks got it worse than we do, at least I can find work. Sure I may be working 6-7 jobs, but money is coming in, even if it is so tight I couldn't squeeze out another cent. Work is the last thing on my mind when I go to sleep and the first thing I think about when I get up. I have so many students that I get them confused. This month I didn't have enough money to, well finish the month.
Sometimes I think about the serfs of fuedal Europe during the Middle Ages. I think to myself that these folks had it much worse than we do, lived shorter, meaner lives, with certainly much more work. I should be thankful for all that I have. I know I should, but why aren't I?
So what's the point here? The point is that I can't go on this way much longer. Something will give soon, I am afraid it will be me. Are we waiting for the economy to improve? What do people worse off than me do? I work more than 70 hours per week. I hate to wake up sometimes because I know I have to just plow through another day. I know what this is. It is wage slavery. I don't know how to beat it and keep my house. I don't know how to keep my house and my sanity too. Like cake and ice cream I want it all. Is asking for reason and sanity asking too much? Pa has labeled what I have as "Adjunctivitis." He used to complain that I work too much. Now he just kisses me and says that it won't be forever. It won't right?
Plain Cake
1 cup sugar (use less if you like, or use honey or Karo)
1/2 cup oil or soft butter
2 eggs ( I have used 1 egg before with limited success)
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup milk
1 1/2 cup flour
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp vanilla
1 cup sour cream, yogurt, applesauce, or thick buttermilk
Beat well, pour into sprayed 8x8 pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 40 minutes. You can add spices for a spice cake or 1/3 cup cocoa for chocolate, or a mashed ripe banana. My favorite is to saute some pineapple or regular apples with brown sugar butter and cinnamon and put in the bottom of the cake pan. You could also add blackberries, raspberries or blueberries to the bottom of the pan, dot with butter, then top with cake batter.
What I am wondering though is, are there any other folks out there like me? Can we get up an Adjunctivitis support group? I don't think that I am going to go postal, but I am going somewhere. Dear reader, if you find yourself in somewhat the same position, give me a shout out. I can't be the only one.