Hello! Here in Smolensk butcher's shop, we marvel at wisdom and foresight of Republican congressional leaders, especially Tea Party, and their approach to debt ceiling issue. They propose big Federal Budget cuts for balance of American books and save AAA (American Autothanasiacs Anonymous) credit rating. And at last Obama is concede.
Of course there plenty many leftist critic of Republican strategy who is say approach wrong. US in situation like 1930s and need new FDR. Danger of US economic slow down is not avert. High spend must create jobs and prop up economic demand.
But this is plenty dangerous communistical bullcrapping.
No. Genius of Republican Tea Party plan, which President Obama now embrace, is it rooted in old American traditions and history. Indeed it try recreate them.
Reduction in Federal spend so savage and far reaching it not simply induce double dipping recession, but full scale depression. Decimation of Medicare, Medicaid, silly Federal support for educations, construction programmes, will create small (even non-existent) state. This will take American economy back to its youthful conditions, before Gold Rush, before Revolution, and all the way to 17th Century, prior to mass European migration. Why? Republican plan simple. Returning America to virgin economic Eden before Mayflower arrival will inspire new wave of economic migration. And who better to exploit new frontier and show themselves true Americans? Of course. The Chinese.
China will invade. Mostly not literally. But their capital investment arrive and buy vast amounts of American resource cheap. And some Chinese people come too of course, to manage new enterprises. But don't worry native Americans, these new settlers won't exterminate you, like previous immigrant waves. No. They will merely economically enslave you, making you provide cheaper labour than they can get in increasingly affluent Far East, while sending your economically useless people - bankers, consultants, anyone working in movie industry on "development" - to reservations in the Midwest, manufactured out of disused Knots Landing sets.
And gradually, driven by new American spirit of Chinese enterprise, America recover and flourish.
But then remnant old Americans, new Chinese immigrants, as well as new wave of Europeans, attracted by possibilities of Great Sino-American Dream, will tire of the yoke of their remote imperialist overlords sitting in old-fashioned splendour in Beijing. Some Chinese liberals will even defect from old Asia to new Amerasia, like reborn Tom Paines, and will support frontiersmen's dreams of self-determination. A new War of Independence will be engaged. Led by descendant of Sarah Palin, who will ride her horse in gloriously historically accurate echo of Paul Revere, "from somewhere near y'know to somewhere else over there". She will cry "the Chinese are coming" and inspire insurgents to rise up. And descendants of Christine O'Donnell (or at least any who have survived the new Salem "I'm Not A Witch" Trials) will throw Chinese tea back in their faces with all force and spunk of people who not masturbate for generations. And provided Chinese don't use their nukes - and who but barbarians do that? - new Sino-American Revolution will succeed and mandarins of old Chinese Empire will be like George III and his descendants, and suffer long slow decline towards life of reality TV, empty ritual and slavish subservience to the new overlords in North Sino-America. Why, old and new masters, both sides of the (Pacific) Pond, will even use subtly different forms of Anglo-Mandarin: two countries divided by a common language.
Tea Party grasp history and show commitment to long term solutions, as whole process of economic decimation, voluntary re-enslavement, growth, upheaval and new liberation will take about 300 years. But surely it worth it to create the new China-American, Ch-America, or, for ease, Shamerica, Tea Party crave.