What I love about conservatives is that they are predictable to the point of being dull.
(And frankly... dull to the point of being predicable.)
They LOVE consequences... it's their version of the pornographic money-shot... until the moment that said consequences AFFECT them, at which point they will blow a hurricane's worth of old-man air and then misapply an Amendment to the Constitution.
Take, in this case, the dim-watt, bone-suit that is Hank Williams Jr...
Short version of events...
#1: In a (sadly) sober ramble, Lil' Hank equates Barack Obama with Adolph Hilter (and does it with such a lack of subtlety that even the morning crew on FOX news -- DOOOOOOOSEY! -- knows its a bad idea).
#2: ESPN, which uses Hanky's "Rowdy Friends" as an intro to Monday Night Football, decides to pull the song before last week's broadcast.
#3: After thinking it over for a couple of days, ESPN decides -- correctly -- that MNF can survive without Jr. Snot-Repository or his BFFs.
#4: Hank Williams Jr., lacking an understanding that you can't quit AFTER you've been fired, releases the following words from his sound-maker...
After reading hundreds of e-mails, I have made MY decision," he wrote. "By pulling my opening Oct 3rd, You (ESPN) stepped on the Toes of The First Amendment Freedom of Speech, so therefore Me, My Song, and All My Rowdy Friends are OUT OF HERE. It's been a great run.
Sigh.
Ok... to all WOWYTRRSFETHCDN (Worshipers Of What You THINK Ronald Reagan Stood For Even Though He Clearly Did Not) the First Amendment is not a Hazmat Suit protecting you from the consequences of being a douchebag.
Yes, you have the RIGHT to say whatever you like and therefore feel free to compare the President to whomever you like... or to call your summer estate Sweet Valley Kikesville... or to hate on Blacks and Gays and Poors and Atheists in whatever single syllabic speech your pappy taught you.
You DO have a right to your insane thoughts and deep-seeded paranoia (because we are, actually, OUT TO GET YOU!)
For that... you WILL NOT BE ARRESTED or PROSECUTED or FORCED TO ACTUALLY SPEND AN HOUR IN THE PRESENCE OF MICHELLE BACHMAN.
But there is no part of...
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
...that protects you against looking like a FOOL HATER, nor protects your right (because you don't HAVE one) to be paid handsomely by a private corporation.
It will not act as a prophylactic against your being disliked... or prevent you from being removed from your position as CEO of Your Company (revoking your ability to go to the Annual Black-Face Parade)... or halt your being mocked and derided because you do not know what you are saying.
Most importantly, it won't stop the world from hearing your words and understanding - deeply -- that you are small minded and ignorant... about humanity... about history... and about how to construct a simple analogy.
Thank you. That is all.
Owner of KillAllWhitePeople Summer Lodges and Suites