My mom is still kicking! And spreading hope at 91.
My mom, the trooper. Strong and resilient come to mind, but she truly is a source of amazement to me. Almost one year ago was in a precarious life state due to a fall; she battled organ near shut downs, a serious wound, swelling that made her gain 30 pounds….and so much more.
Today she is bragging to all who will listen @ her assisted living facility that her family “kept her out to midnight” on Christmas. Oh and did I mention that she is 4 months short of 92.
An Italian girl (by culture, yet born in USA) with three brothers, her parents surely loved her but treated her as, well, a girl. Everyone else got bikes and she got…to clean the house. Even when she returned from serving her country in WW2 and could have used the GI Bill to go to college, her parents instead told her to keep working and help support the family. So, she did.
But she became a fierce feminist well before the word was coined. When she had a son and daughter, was obsessed with fairness and with giving both kids opportunities and chances. And that she did. Upon the dissolving of her father’s estate, opened an account and watched it grow to afford two great colleges for her kids, all the while, needing day to day things for herself but foregoing them. She was going to create opportunity for someone else and she was determined.
She stressed living simply and doing things for others. Even when working two jobs, if someone passed away she was the first to bring dinner and to offer support. This was one of the most important things that she, and yes, church taught me. Your life is not about you. It’s about seeking those who need you. And that theme is driving me to bring her pieces of joy and love the past year, at whatever level we could find them.
I haven’t even mentioned her best trait. A wicked sense of humor. At the oddest times…as in, at just about all times, finds humor as a release but also a true outlook. Laughter and not taking ourselves too seriously is the best trait someone could have. It makes both the good and bad times better.
Now that she needs help for day to day stuff, she is living where she needs to be. Yet, still looks out for others, asking me to get someone’s walker for them…or just offering kind words to her fellow residents who are in worse shape, or just having a bad day. At Christmas, she kept saying I am doing nothing….expressing guilt for not doing her usual shopping, cards and calls. I told that after 91 Christmases it’s ok to let others help.
And so she did….and we had a wonderful holiday of laughter and family and staying out to midnight. She made jokes in her cards, like I have a walker but I am still “kicking”….and, the day after Christmas went to exercise class at 11AM, saying she believes that it really does help. A zest for life, a laugh that is infectious and the desire to still be kicking in her soul, after the worst year ever. Now that’s saying something.
Merry Christmas! Keep on laughing, keep on kicking and help others to do the same.