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Screw your "million years," Arpaio. At best you'll be a tiny salt shaker of grey dust by then and, besides, it's happening now, even though the dipshit Maricopa County Board of Supervisors is too shakey-legs to schedule a public discussion of your over-the-top malfeasance. Oh no, we can't talk about that in public -- you know, like citizens.

Local activists for the past two months have demanded supervisors schedule a forum on Wednesday's board agenda to discuss recent events involving the Sheriff's Office. The forum will not be held Wednesday, however.

Supervisors instead plan to accommodate protesters at an update meeting on the sheriff's budget, where controls placed in that budget and audits of his operations will be discussed. Sheriff's staff and the county attorney are expected to attend. Supervisors consider it a more appropriate venue to address public concerns. Arizona Republic

And while we're at it, supervisors, suck on this big fat "more appropriate venue." What the Sam-fucking-Hill is that? Another "quiet room" where you control the conversation and media access? Here we have a living, breathing Yosemite Sam racist gasbag (no offense, Yosemite) who has been accused by the Department of Justice, after a three-year investigation, of overseeing the most corrupt and discriminatory law program in U.S. history (let that set in while you take another sip), and he is thrusting his nearly 80-year-old middle finger at the US Constitution, he is flaccidly mooning, in more ways than one, every standard of decency on the books (sorry for that image).

But I can certainly see why the Maricopa County Board of Supervisors, four of five who are Republicans that must swallow the carp named Arpaio (no offense, fishies), because if they don't something bad might happen.

The supervisors, sheriff and county attorney have been hesitant to criticize each other, fearing a resurgence of infighting will rekindle negative publicity that led to criticism.

No, you wouldn't want to create "infighting." What you guys are doing now is fantastic, no "criticism" at all. You wouldn't want to upset the happy roll you're on. It's just that you're the most corrupt, costly, bungling, and bigoted sheriff's office in the nation, and everybody knows it. Who the fuck is the sheriff in Bismark, North Dakota? I don't know and neither do you probably, unless you live there, and maybe not even then. But you probably know the sheriff of Marikafka County, Arizona, who was just subpoenaed by a Georgia judge to appear this week at a hearing looking into the president's birth certificate. Oh, the judge subpoenaed Obama too. Good luck with that.

Last year, after Arizona became the first state to pass a birther bill in the legislature (strike up the band as Arizona chalks up another "first" during its Centennial Year), Governor Jan Brewer, in a stunningly rare moment of clarity, vetoed the legislation, partly because the bill mentioned dickheads. Seriously, the bill wasn't only authored by dickheads, true of most legislation here, it was about dickheads. But even in failure, the legislature's bold penis-centric birthery move, cheered on by the UPPER-CASE looneys one meets in the online comments of the Arizona Republic, no doubt pushed "America's toughest sheriff" to probe the president's Kenyan connection.

Because that's something county sheriffs do. Yours is probably hard at work too looking into the president's genealogy, even if it means he has to ignore investigating more than 400 sex crimes, some committed on children as young as two. That was the decision our county sheriff, Joe Arpaio, made at some point: assemble a posse to investigate the President of the United States, a red-meat ploy that was going nowhere -- which is what he chose to do -- or prosecute hundreds of known criminals who prey on children -- which is what Arpaio chose not to do.    

Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio manages the only county law office in the state that has witnessed an increase in crime. Not the border that he has such a hard-on for, where crossings and crime are down considerably. No, the uptick in real crime, not the burger-flippers Arpaio hunts down on the TV news, is in his backyard. In addition to crime, Joe-Broderick-Crawford-Arpaio (no offense, Broderick) and his TV pals and super cock-fighting military tanks cost taxpayers millions. Lots.

More than $50 million so far in lawsuits because, for one thing, Arpaio's goose-stepping deputies stop Hispanics, sez the DOJ investigation, 4 to 9 times more often than others without cause -- the very definition of racial profiling. Or because he and former County Attorney Andrew Thomas, who is now fighting more than 30 ethics charges in court, filed vindictive yet hollow lawsuits against their political enemies, only to see those victims file countersuits in the millions. And let's not even get into the $100 million Arpaio stole from inmate services to feed his immigration task force.

Last month another man died while in the custody of at least eight Maricopa County deputies. You've probably seen the video of Gulf War veteran Marty Atencio being Tased to death. Where else does this happen so regularly in America that we are no longer shocked by it but in Maricopa County, Arizona?

This conversation should be public, but Max Wilson, chair of the Board of County Supervisors, thinks otherwise, which he made clear when referring to Randy Parraz, President of Citizens for a Better Arizona:

"If he wanted to come and have a conversation with me for a period of time, I would be glad to do that," Wilson said. "I'm not going to do it on stage. I'm not going to do it like we're putting on some sort of show for him and his group. For him to stir up and delay and waste two or three hours of the board's time, that gets him publicity.

Parraz and "his group" took down Senator Russell Pearce and now they're focused on Joe Arpaio. But I can see why Wilson wouldn't want to "waste two or three hours" of anyone's time on such an insignificant matter. And I can see why he wouldn't want to grant anyone else publicity, since Sheriff Arpaio himself has seldom sought the limelight. His PR office will tell you that.    

Originally posted to Maggie's Farm on Wed Jan 25, 2012 at 03:07 AM PST.

Also republished by LatinoKos and Baja Arizona Kossacks.

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