Someone forgot to tell Newt he lost. (Octavian Cantilli/Reuters)
If you were lucky enough to miss the post-Florida primary night speeches from Mitt Romneybot and Newt Gingrich, here are some select choice snippets.
MITT ROMNEY:
This campaign is about more than replacing a President. It is about saving the soul of America. President Obama and I have two very different visions of America.
You know who else has a different vision of America than Mitt Romney?
Mitt Romney.
President Obama’s view of capitalism is to send your money to his friends’ companies. My vision for free enterprise is to return entrepreneurship to the genius and creativity of the American people.
... and then over-leveraging them, sucking out their cash, and bankrupting them.
President Obama believes America’s role as leader in the world is a thing of the past. He is intent on shrinking our military capacity at a time when the world faces rising threats. I will insist on a military so powerful no one would ever think of challenging it.
President Obama has adopted a strategy of appeasement and apology.
If you don't believe it, just ask Osama Bin Laden and John McCain's pal Muammar Gaddafi!
President Obama wants to “fundamentally transform” America. We want to restore America to the founding principles that made this country great.
In other words, you want to fundamentally transform America to the way it was back in the 1700s?
I’m asking each of you to remember how special it is to be an American.
Why? Have you forgotten?
I want you to remember when you weren’t afraid to look at your retirement savings or the price at the pump.
Do you remember anything like that in your life?
I want you to remember when our White House reflected the best of who we are, not the worst of what Europe has become.
Europe is awful, except when hiding out in France during the Vietnam War, or parking money in Swiss banks!
NEWT GINGRICH's!
We are going to contest every place, and we are going to win, and we will be in Tampa as the nominee in August.
I rate that pants on fire! You can't contest places where you're not on the ballot (Missouri, Virginia), and you can't win delegates where you don't have them (Tennessee).
So designing and putting together a people’s campaign, not a Republican campaign, not an establishment campaign, not a Wall Street- funded campaign, a people’s campaign [...]
A people's campaign funded by one people. Sheldon Adelson.
Let’s talk briefly about the power of ideas.
I'm sold!
Recite the words to "America the Beautiful," because that's apparently what you idiots want.
— @GingrichIdeas via web
Choose "Teleprompter Jokes" as my running mate.
— @GingrichIdeas via web
In 1980, I was very honored to be able to help put together the first Capitol steps. And at that point, Senate and House candidates came together with Governor Reagan. David Broder wrote about it in the Washington Post. It was a very courageous decision by Reagan because he didn’t have to run as part of a team.
Nothing says "outsider candidate" than quoting praise from David Broder.
We will on that day sign an executive order that will instruct the State Department that day to open the embassy in Jerusalem and recognize Israel.
Too late, Mr. Historian. Israel was officially recognized by the U.S. on January 31, 1949.
[M]any of you may have noticed that the Obama administration has declared war on the Catholic Church and other religious institutions. I want you to know that, on the very first day, I will sign an executive order repealing every anti-religious act of the Obama administration as of that moment.
You mean the one that forbids federal funds from going to institutions that discriminate? And here I thought you opposed government spending!
The reason I’m comfortable telling you all this is I have been studying what America needs to do, since the fall of 1958
I thought studying was bad.
My commitment is to unleash the spirit of the American people, to find new and innovative and positive things, to do them seven days a week,
First child labor, now getting rid of the weekend?
I promise you that if I become your president, I pledge to you my life, my fortune, and my sacred honor.
What if you don't?
Because really, you won't.