if i might be a bit indulgent in my first entry into Readers and Book Lovers (yes, i DID use caps there - this is an important group!), may i start with a bit of a personal story.
in 2004, i had begun riding my beautiful younger horse again after a long hiatus. we had hurdles to cross - he was overweight, i was not fit. i travelled out of town for a week to work in san diego, he was to be "worked" (lunged and ridden) the week i was gone. what i didn't know the day i got back, saddle him and got up on his back, was that it had rained that whole week so the young barn manager took him out of the paddock and put him in a small stall - and left him there all week without working him! 20 minutes into the ride, i learned how to dismount rapidly without meaning to do so. the resulting 6 days in the hospital until the clamshell brace for my broken back arrived gave me time to start choosing the library of books to read during the next four months of recovery.
come with me over the squiggle and i'll share how that experience led me to my favorite author of all time!
shortly after settling into the new location for me and my (then) two horses, i started to read - and read - and read. i found laughter really helped me forget the burst L-1 and made the time go quickly.
after finishing the entire collection of terry pratchett's discworld series and his young person's series, i wanted something new - and, to my delight - in a book store i flipped open the cover of an interesting title and read this introduction:
The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove
by Christopher Moore
The town psychiatrist has decided to switch everybody in Pine Cove, California, from their normal antidepressants to placebos, so naturally -- well, to be accurate, artificially -- business is booming at the local blues bar. Trouble is, those lonely slide-guitar notes have also attracted a colossal sea beast named Steve with, shall we say, a thing for explosive oil tanker trucks. Suddenly, morose Pine Cove turns libidinous and is hit by a mysterious crime wave, and a beleaguered constable has to fight off his own gonzo appetites to find out whats wrong and what, if anything, to do about it.
i was immediately hooked! the writing was crisp, acerbic, witty and downright hysterical! this author, christopher moore (the author guy - named so after the introduction of skinner, the biologist's dog, who reduces everything into its sublime simplicity of "hunger, happy, dangerous" categories.
Theophilus crowe, the local sheriff who grows his own marijuana, is the character who has to resolve the disappearance of the local "missonaries" and other annoying folk who somehow get eaten by the sea monster now in the form of a doublewide trailer - recognized ONLY by molly michon - the former b-movie action heroine who keeps slipping back into her movie character when she's gone off her meds.
go back to the first paragraph - about the psychiatrist who swithes everyone to placebos without telling them, and a fun sociological romp into a small town begins.
when i finished this book, i purchased every book chris had written, delighted to find that his off-beat humor was expressed in many different forms - from delving into "morality" (practical demonkeeping) to mystical guides (coyote blue) to the dilemma of having a vampire as a girl friend ("bloodsucking fiends" - with two more books to come on this series: "bite me" and "you suck")
now, if you aren't piqued by these titles and the blurb from the first book, let me assure you that these are just the tip of the iceberg of a wonderfully eclectic writer who mixes politics with personality disorders and a wide array of the most fascinating characters you'll ever meet. throw in a bit of the supernatural to add spice and zest and you'll find you are unable to stop until you own all his books.
an added bonus is that your favorite characters jump binders into different books! chris incorporates cross-overs when readers beg him for more of certain characters (like roberto, the talking fruit bat who wears tiny raybans "cause he no like the light").
now, this daily kos series is about books that change our lives or affect our lives. two of chris' books made indelible impact on my life.
the first book, "a dirty job", was written after the death of chris' mother and of charlee's mother (chris' wifey/girlfriend). he was looking for answers - and, with "a dirty job", he offers a wonderful insight into the passage from one world to another.
the book brings comfort and laughter at the time of tears - and leaves the reader with a sense of searching for "life vessels" of those they have loved who have died.
the second book that chris wrote that was originally banned in boston, now it is taught in many seminaries, is called "LAMB, the gospel according to biff, christ's childhood pal". for this book, chris travelled to the holy land and spent time learning what it must have been like to live in that terrain and during the days of the gospels.
this, too, is a very different look at religion - at the human side of faith - and how that faith sometimes is unclear. when you hear someone say "this must be another mustardseed thing...", you have just met someone who reads moore. his words fall into everyday language of those who read him. only in the wonderful imagination of christopher moore can you find answers to the missing questions of josh' youth!
as his works grow, he expands into newer and wider topics. having spent time in london to write "FOOL" - a telling of the lear story from the eyes of pocket, the fool, he mixes many of the bard's tales into the lear story and takes you through the tragedy that now becomes a true comedy that leaves you laughing wildly through the end of the book.
why, you ask, am i reviewing an author instead of delving into a specific work of his right now? well, in slightly less than a month, the newest book will be released. the book, "sacre bleu" (for the color deemed to be sacred) will be available on april 3 - and chris will be in bookstores around the country starting in san francisco. he doesn't do readings - he talks - and talks - and talks. he talks writing but MOSTLY he talks politics. his insight on this subject is as brilliant as his writing. for those lucky enough to be in an area where he will tour, here is the link to the schedule. go. it is worth seeing the world through the eyes of moore - it will leave you wanting MORE MOORE!
one final note on how this author changed my life. it was the night of the reelection of gwb for president. i was depressed beyond description. the darkness of the failure of our political system felt like we had all been betrayed.
then, i stumbled onto this on chris' original blog. it is with his permission that i repost it here.
Why this Election is a win-win Situation for us All!
Let me tell you a story that came to mind today, while I was thinking about the election, and reading the depressed, anxious, disappointed, e-mails from many of you guys. See if this doesn’t make you feel, as it did me, a little bit better.
My Uncle Johnny was a mechanical genius. He could completely disassemble an automobile down to the smallest part and put it back together and it would work. In fact, he did that once, a black Lincoln, during his vacation. Socially he was a little rough, a Georgia boy with an eighth grade education and a bit of a mean streak, but he could make anything mechanical sing. A tall, skinny Southerner with a cigarette dangling perpetually from his lip while he worked, one eye squinting and watering under the smoke, the irritated look on his face something between a scowl and the evil eye, a shock of blue-black hair falling in his other eye – Uncle Johnny frightened some people, but machines smiled when he passed. Machines loved him.
Early on, shortly after he married my Aunt Geneva, my mother’s sister, Uncle Johnny took his family North to work on the giant steel freighters that prowl the Great Lakes, hauling steel from Ohio and Pennsylvania up to Detroit, where it is pounded into Fords. Before long he was made chief engineer on one of the ships, spending the bulk of his time below among the giant pistons of the diesel generators that ran the giant electric motors that turned the screws that pushed hundreds of thousands of tons of steel across the water. Uncle Johnny, lived most of his life in the company of his gargantuan machines (and a couple of machinists's mates he liked to yell at.) I don’t remember seeing Uncle Johnny smile, but I’ll bet he did when he was down there in his engine room.
So, one cold October day, Uncle Johnny's ship was making the run from Toledo to Detroit with a full load and a new captain at the helm, and as they were approaching the dock, at full speed, but still a mile or so out, the machinists’s mate called to Uncle Johnny.
"Sir, we are coming in way too fast. We need to reverse the props."
“Nope,” replied Uncle Johnny. "Wait for the order."
And the great ship plowed on.
“But Sir, we have to reverse the props or we’ll hit the dock.”
“Yep,” said Uncle Johnny. “We sure as hell will. Wait for the order.”
“Wait? Sir, there’s no way we can slow the ship down in time.”
“Goddamn right, son, and if I reverse her now, it’ll be my fault when we hit, but if I wait for the order, and then reverse ‘em, and go full throttle, and we still hit, then it was the Captain’s fault. I was just waiting for the order. So I’m waiting for the Goddamn order.”
“But we’ll hit either way?”
“Yep. You be ready to reverse when the order comes down, and then you best grab your ass and brace for impact.”
“Aye, aye, sir.”
They smashed the shit out of the dock in Detroit, did about 1.5 million dollars of damage, and that was in 1970 dollars. Nearly sank the ship.
Uncle Johnny had a long career, and retired with a clean record. The captain, he went on to pilot a Yellow Cab.
Well, imagine, if you will, that the United States is a big ship. A really big ship. Like one of the great steel haulers, it takes miles and miles to slow her down once she’s moving. And whoever gives the order to reverse the props is going to take the blame for the damage that is done. Isn’t it right that the captain who put that ship up to full throttle without looking at the charts to see how far from the dock he was, should take responsibility for the damage?
There you go.
Could John Kerry have changed the direction of the war, reconnected with our allies, repaired the environmental policies, bolstered the economy, and fixed the health care system in four years? Probably not. I was hopeful, but things really are a huge mess. I don’t think anyone can turn this leviathan ship of doom around. Too much momentum. So, looking on the bright side, grab your ass and brace for impact. At least it’s not our guy at the helm. We did, after all, yell “lookout”, the 48% of us. We did our duty and we can sleep safe in the wreckage, our consciences clear, our hands clean, our souls light.
And if, by some bizarre stroke of irony, things actually do get better, the killing stops, our friends respect us, our rights are protected, we can all afford heath care, well what a joy it will be to have been wrong. What a narrow escape we will have made from disaster. And in our little ship metaphor, the dock, which is the rest of the world, will be happy and safe and we will all smile like Uncle Johnny’s great machines. It could happen.
Churchill once said, “There is no thrill so great as being shot at, and missed.” What a thrill we will have had!
But just in case, even as you enjoy the sense of speeding toward a bright and hopeful future, grab your ass and brace for impact. Just know that it ain't your fault.
this is a wise man who is also funny, brilliant, genius and, weirdly enough, incredibly unassuming.
when i first finished reading all his books, i sent his publisher an email wailing "OH NO! i fell off my horse and broke my back - when i read christopher moore's books, i don't need painkillers because i am laughing so hard i forget i hurt! i NEED more MOORE!!!
imagine my surprise when i received a return emain, not from his publisher's office but from him directly... where he said his next book was at the publisher's, so now i needed to concentrate on healing!
when i met him at the first signing, he remembered me - and at the next signing for the next book, he looked up and said "EDRIE!" - as he remembers all who come to see him at his signings. we are not "fans" - we are friends!
please, to take the pressure off in this highly charged world of political mayhem, take a moment out to read one of chris' books - pick one - any one - you will never regret it and you will never be the same!