God is a Politician Wannabe! Who knew?? The Republicans KNEW, that's who!
Gosh, the god is a busy guy. And man he sure talks to the wrong people or the only ones who listen to him are just Republicans.
God: The Most Powerful Republican Swing Voter
Rick Santorum's wife, Karen, made headlines on Thursday when she told conservative talk show host Glenn Beck that it was "God's will" that her husband runs for President.
"I did always feel in my heart that God had big plans for Rick. Eventually it was there, tugging at my heart," she said.
But Santorum is not the only candidate who God has pushed into the race.
Judging from the comments of the Republican candidates, God is the ultimate Republican swing voter. Like the Republican electorate, He apparently can't decide who he supports for the nomination, and He is constantly hoping for a new candidate to enter the race.
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Former Godfathers' Pizza CEO Herman Cain was the first candidate to hear God urging him to run for President.
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God also pushed Michele Bachmann to jump into the race.
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Apparently God wanted more than just Bachmann and Cain, so the lord of the universe encouraged Newt Gingrich to seek the nomination. When asked in 2010 if he was planning to run for president, Ginrich replied "I suspect that will be up to God and the American people."
A little over a year later, God apparently gave Newt the go-ahead -- despite his multiple religious conversions and three marriages.
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God wasn't done yet though. Last summer, as Republican voters vocally expressed their dissatisfaction with the field that He helped put together, God urged another Republican -- Texas Governor Rick Perry -- to jump into the field.
So overall, at least five Republican candidates feel that God called upon them to run for president. In an interesting twist, they happen to be the five candidates who have caused the most controversy throughout the campaign, and arguably done the most damage to the Republican brand. If you believe that this is the field that God has assembled for the Republican primary, then it is hard not to conclude that He must be seriously pulling for the Democratic Party.
Well, Cain was unchosen cause the 999 was too obviously 666 upside down so god said 'you goofed' to Herman.
And Bachman was unchosen cause god wants the War on Women to prevail and ya just can't have a woman leading the way for that cause that would be too hypocritical.
And Perry was unchosen cause he couldn't remember all what god told him to say.
So if you are chosen by god the politician you Have to be a Republican. No ands, ifs or butts about it. Republicans OWN GOD and don't you forget that!
If you're a Democrat religious person you might want to seek a different God or you might be seen as a wolf in sheep's clothing..
God apparently only talks to Republicans cause they are the TRUE Followers, Team Players, Pledge signers and Loyalists who willingly follow God's righteous holy teachings;
God Hates women. God hates homosexuals. God hates Poor People. God hates education. God hates Democracy.
The proof is in the Republican Christian Pudding.
Any questions?