Last night, Jon Stewart blasted the GOP for whining over Obama's ad about bin Laden. Jon then proceeded to go to the videotape to show Republicans doing the exact same thing they're whining about now back in 2004. Make this go viral, folks. Post the Daily Show links on any right-winger's page you know. Don't let them weasel their way out of this one. Make them own it.
The death of bin Laden was the first event since 9/11 that really brought us all together, which of course is why one year later, this ad touting Obama's steadfast and presidential leadership during the raid, whilst subtlety questioning his opponent's judgment... mmm... that ad is tearing us apart!
SEAN HANNITY (4/30/2012): Since we all know this administration is not above politicizing any issue for personal gain....
SEN. JOHN MCCAIN, R-AZ (5/1/2012): ... politicizing what, an event that all Americans applauded enormously ...
REP. MICHAEL TURNER, R-OH (5/1/2012): It's deplorable to politicize this.
JONAH GOLDBERG (4/30/2012): It's the President of the United States who said he wasn't going to spike the football in all this, we shouldn't gloat about it, running campaign ads gloating about it.
"Wah. (pauses to think) Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah."
So let me get this straight. Republicans, you're annoyed by the arrogance and braggadocio of a wartime President's political ad. You think he's divisively and unfairly belittling his opponents, I see. I have a question: ARE YOU ON CRACK??? Were you alive, lo, these past ten years? It seems unseemly for the President to spike the football. Bush landed on a fucking aircraft carrier with a football-stuffed codpiece; he spiked the football before the game had even started!
(wild audience cheering and applause)
Yes, your Republican caterwauling and outrage is the subject of our new segment,
Video and full transcript below the fold.
You know, many of you may already know this. Today is a special day. It's the one-year anniversary of the death of Osama bin Laden. Just twelve months ago, parents across the country had to suddenly explain to their children why they had just shouted at the TV, "FUCK YEAH!!!!!! AMERICA!!!!!!"
The death of bin Laden was the first event since 9/11 that really brought us all together, which of course is why one year later, this ad touting Obama's steadfast and presidential leadership during the raid, whilst subtlety questioning his opponent's judgment... mmm... that ad is tearing us apart!
SEAN HANNITY (4/30/2012): Since we all know this administration is not above politicizing any issue for personal gain....
SEN. JOHN MCCAIN, R-AZ (5/1/2012): ... politicizing what, an event that all Americans applauded enormously ...
REP. MICHAEL TURNER, R-OH (5/1/2012): It's deplorable to politicize this.
JONAH GOLDBERG (4/30/2012): It's the President of the United States who said he wasn't going to spike the football in all this, we shouldn't gloat about it, running campaign ads gloating about it.
"Wah. (pauses to think) Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah."
So let me get this straight. Republicans, you're annoyed by the arrogance and braggadocio of a wartime President's political ad. You think he's divisively and unfairly belittling his opponents, I see. I have a question: ARE YOU ON CRACK??? Were you alive, lo, these past ten years? It seems unseemly for the President to spike the football. Bush landed on a fucking aircraft carrier with a football-stuffed codpiece; he spiked the football before the game had even started!
(wild audience cheering and applause)
Yes, your Republican caterwauling and outrage is the subject of our new segment,
Former Bush 43 adviser and current Mitt Romney campaign adviser Ed Gillespie:
ED GILLESPIE (4/29/2012): He took something that was a unifying event for all Americans ... and he's managed to turn it into a divisive, partisan political attack.
(Jon facepalms)
Yeah, that'd be like in 2004, saying something like, if Kerry had his policies in place today, Saddam Hussein would not only be in Baghdad, he'd be in Kuwait.
ED GILLESPIE (2/24/2004): If John Kerry had his policies in place today, Saddam Hussein would not only be in Baghdad, he'd be in Kuwait.
Oh my gosh, Blurry Ed Gillespie is divisive and partisan! By the way, Blurry Gillespie also the name of a great but lesser heralded trumpet player. Nobody ever booked Blurry, just Dizzy.
And there's more!
ED GILLESPIE (4/29/2012): It's the attack that, you know, Governor Romney wouldn't have done it. ... You see in the Bush ads saying, you know, he's a strong leader. You don't see him saying, and that guy, you know, would have done something different.
Yes, yes, the Democrats have taken past Romney statements and used them to project how a hypothetical President Romney would act. It's so devious of Democrats to steal that tactic. Cerebral cortex, activate!
2004 BUSH CAMPAIGN AD VOICEOVER: Now Kerry says we have to get back to the place where terrorists are a "nuisance", like gambling and prostitution. ... How can Kerry protect us when he doesn't understand the threat?
GEORGE W. BUSH: I'm George W. Bush, and I approved this message.
No, no! Actually, in hindsight, according to Gillespie, you don't approve of that message. You think it's divisive and partisan. The guy just said that.
But there are other troubling aspects to this anniversary.
5/1/2012:
MARTHA MACCALLUM: One might expect that the President would say, you know, "great day, great job on behalf of those Navy SEALs", of course.
...
GEORGE PATAKI: I would do what a leader is supposed to do, and that is give credit to others, and particularly give credit to those who are out there on the front line.
Yes, some thank yous. That is troubling. Why can't Obama just say something like this?
BARACK OBAMA (5/1/2011): We give thanks to the men who carried out this operation.
BARACK OBAMA (9/10/2011): Thanks to the remarkable courage and precision of our forces.
BARACK OBAMA (6/22/2011): Thanks to our intelligence professionals and special forces.
BARACK OBAMA (1/24/2012): ... the pilot who landed the helicopter ... the translator ... the troops ... the SEALs ...
BARACK OBAMA (6/22/2011): We killed Osama bin Laden.
(wild audience applause)
Really. He honestly, I think, thanked everybody but Harvey Weinstein. I think.
Unbelievable! Now, by the way, in a cacophony of galling Republican forgetfulness, a.k.a., Ballzheimer's, George Pataki stands alone. Spread the credit around? Thank the people who made it all possible? Here's George Pataki at the 2004 Republican Convention.
GEORGE PATAKI (9/2/2004): On September 11th, al-Qaeda attacked again. But this time, they made a terrible mistake. There's one thing they didn't bank on. They didn't bank on George W. Bush. ... He didn't run from history, he faced it. ... He mobilized our forces and went to Afghanistan. ... George Bush protected our country, and he protects it still! (GOP audience cheering)
"By himself! Because George Bush is Iron Man!"
That's just fact! Now to be fair, not every conservative's criticizing Obama for the ad. Some are criticizing him for talking about the ad in front of foreigners.
BRIT HUME (4/30/2012): The Obama team now seems to be trying to magnify the political benefit of the raid, with that campaign ad suggesting Mitt Romney might not have ordered it. In the rough and tumble of a campaign, such distortions may be commonplace. But for the President himself to do it, in the presence of a foreign leader in the White House, brings one word to mind: Yuck.
By the way, if you enjoyed that, you should check out Brit Hume's new show, Brit Hume's One-Word Reviews.
Good.
Really?
Smurftastic.
Rawr.
But I get it, I get it, Brit. You can't shit on your opponent during an official function, like greeting a head of state. I'm just curious, did your cerebral cortex not record this Bush election year gem with Iraqi Prime Minister Allawi?
GEORGE W. BUSH (9/21/2004): We agree that the world is better off with Saddam Hussein sitting in a prison cell. And that stands in stark contrast to the statement my opponent made yesterday.
"Yuck." And there's plenty more where that came from.
Look, Republicans, yeah, the Obama ad, kinda shitty. A little bit of a cheap shot. But the only reason you're pissed is that you didn't get to run it. Cuz let's face it, if bin Laden had been killed on Bush's watch, this would've been the ad you're running with.
VOICEOVER: He was responsible for one of our darkest days. One of the most evil men in history.
GEORGE W. BUSH: And I got him! That's right, me! George W. "Bin Laden Killer" Bush! He was all like, "No! Please, Mr. President!" And I was all like, "You're goin' down, Texas style!" Cuz vengeance is a dish best served barbecued. And where was John Kerry? Windsailing to Pussy Island! Good thing you got a President with Epcot balls!
How'd I know where he was hiding? Reagan told me in a dream.
RONALD REAGAN: Well, kill one for the Gipper, George.
GEORGE W. BUSH: Long story short, you're welcome, America. Take that, beardy!
Yee-haw! I'm George W. Bush, and I sure as hell approve this message!
We'll be right back.
Lewis Black then railed against
artisanal foods.
Meanwhile, Stephen also briefly mocked the GOP outrage over the Obama ad.
He then focused on Paul Ryan and his
budget cuts affecting mostly the poor, and how Georgetown University's Father
Thomas Reese called him out for worshipping Ayn Rand more than Jesus Christ.
Stephen interviewed British Occupier
Carne Ross, while Jon interviewed Christian revisionist
David Barton. The interview went long, of course, so here's the whole unedited interview in three parts.
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3