From Aldus Shrugged , by Floyd Blue. Coming soon to mixed media near you! This passage was fictionalized from a real experience I, the excerpted book's author, had with Dinesh D'Souzah, when he used to blog on aol. I commented twice on his horrid blog, and he actually emailed me with the most juvenile petty retorts, not at all befitting his supposed intellectuality nor his position as a resident scholar at an acclaimed institution. I posted a comment: "It's amazing that Stanford keeps you on the rolls." He emailed me verbatim: Ha Ha, don't you mean roles? (I guess he never heard of payROLL...dope!)
Anyway, this passage is my take on the Regnery types: From a conversation between our hero, Seth, and his new-found friend of like mind, Dessa.
"...Just then Dessa blurted out, ‘Ucchh, Seth, is that your book?’
‘What book? What?’ I didn’t know what she meant, but when I looked over I saw a hardcover screed on the counter. ‘Oh god, no, it must be Roger’s, I guess. He musta left it...Probably on purpose, knowing him.’
‘It’s that latest one by Darvish Corsica. Such garbage, Seth. Do you know what he says in here? He says President Obama is ruining everything that made our country great! Everything. On purpose! No, he doesn’t just differ on a policy point. Obama is supposedly opposed to the entire concept of America and American exceptionalism, and he’s ruining it on purpose, destroying the American dream.’ Dessa did the opposition research too, I see. ‘And he actually believes he knows how our president thinks! How he thinks! Incredible!’
I added, ‘Darvish is an immigrant, too. I mean, we all are, and he can speak out all he wants: his opinions are as valid as the next guy’s. But he wasn’t born here. He didn’t come here till he was 17. I just want to know where his opinions come from. He very smugly acts as if he’s got the social pulse of this entire country, and he thinks he’s more American than our president. But what feel does he really have for America, except from like-minded people he listens to, or maybe TV, or from books?’
‘And what books does he read?’ She added. ‘Probably garbage like he writes!’
‘You wanna laugh?’ I interjected. ‘He actually emailed me the last couple of months. He used to blog on aol. I posted one comment to an article he wrote: some awful opinion piece about how conservatives are happier people than liberals. I mean, sure he’s smart, but a lot of people are smart. Big deal! It doesn’t mean he isn’t ideologically blinded. That can make geniuses look stupid. His article was full of just more sweeping generalizations from his own head. And he actually emailed me! He was so smug, you could feel it right through the email. He told me I was the type who would do this, and I was the type who would do that. What educated person could possibly think like that, and write it, and not be embarrassed by his own simple-minded projections? All he did was prove to me that he’s prejudiced. Then he emails me again, and corrects my word usage in another comment I posted. He actually took the time to email me and correct my wording! And he wasn’t even right! I had used the right word, and yet he stuck out his neck, went out of his way to correct me, all conceited and self-assured! Oh god, I almost felt embarrassed for him. Ucchh, how could someone be so petty, and so shameless? Fulbush Scholar at Stanford? Yeah right…whatever.’
'There’s one company that publishes this crap and assures they’re best-sellers. They publish all the conspiracy and birther shit. Darvish fits right into their business model. He actually claims Obama’s anti-colonialism, and anti-American stances came from his father, who was a Kenyan Socialist or something like that. And the publisher treats his word as gospel!’
That’s pretty much his standard blather. He writes entire books, hypothesizing on the possibilities that our president is actually a loyal Kenyan Socialist – or is it a Kenyo-European anti-Colonialist, which is apparently the most insidious strain of the nasty hybrid Socialism and Fascism, or something like that. Who the hell knows what he even thinks? That’s the whole point: it’s just crap from his own head, with no basis whatsoever.
‘He can write anything he wants and a small slice of people will slurp it up as truth!’ I said. ‘He claims our president is bent on destroying America and all we stand for: The strawman/bogeymen fantasy presented as fact.’
‘Yes,’ Dessa added, quickly, ‘I read a review of that garbage. He uses the racial/cultural angle to claim that Obama’s father must have exerted a tremendous influence on his son, even though he was raised by his mom, and he only met his dad once after he was a baby. But, by god, since his dad was a Muslim, and a Kenyan, somehow Barack himself MUST follow in his father’s path. I swear, he subtly paints a picture of our president as a Kenyan witch doctor, or something. He knows what he’s doing! Dog-whistle Darvish…’
‘Dog-shit Darvish is more like it. There are opinions based on fact, and then there are opinions just based on belief, or from la-la land in your head. So then just be honest and call it a novel or a comic book. There’s tremendous responsibility that comes with free speech. For an educated writer not to ensure people know the difference when he blathers, is disingenuous and irresponsible; and an insult to his readers. He must think they’re all stupid! I’m sick of people with a modicum of intelligence or power treating me like I’m stupid!’
‘Oh, I agree, and I believe that people like him cannot possibly know how petty and jealous they look, or they would be truly ashamed.’ Dessa added, ‘What’s Darvish’s next historical book going to be called: Close Your Eyes and Imagine What If…?’
‘There’s a lot of money in that garbage, but that doesn’t make it right or noble.’ I was sick of his whole act, a microcosm of the general discourse, and our acceptance of pure conjecture and pure lies. He’s just another lying son of a bitch who knows better but acts as if he doesn’t. Get in line behind your extremist friends, asshole, and make some more blood money off of conjecture, fear-mongering, and utterly dangerous disrespect. You’ve found your niche market in this whole new anti-Obama industry, so go and drain some more blood. It’s Capitalism. Go pretend you offer something real. Be a proud American, and remember, Americans have always supported their president when push came to shove - or at least they never delegitimized him - especially during wartime. Do you not understand that?..."
Thank you for reading!