Skip to main content

Last night, Stephen Colbert looked at how Mitt Romney has been asking Republican governors to keep it quiet about the improving economy in their states.

Unfortunately for Mitt Romney, not everything is coming up dead roses.  Some key swing states are actually rebounding, and the Republican governors of those states naturally want to look good.  And their reluctance to get on the gloom wagon brings us to tonight's Wørd: Silver Maligning.

Folks, one of the swing states, Florida, was devastated by the recession, but has recently rebounded, under the leadership of Republican Governor and grown-up Bat Boy Rick Scott,

who recently tooted his own horn with this ad.


NARRATOR: Across Florida, here's the news.  Companies are hiring, expanding, putting more Floridians to work.  Florida's unemployment rate continues to get better, now at a 3-year low. ... Florida's getting back to work.
Now, good for him.  But folks, here's the problem.  One pollster, when he saw that commercial, said, "I initially thought it was an Obama ad."  And many elderly Florida voters are already easily confused.  'Cause you know what else they think are ads for Obama?  These.

Well, the Romney campaign knew they had to do something.  (Horse Dancing!)  Now, according to Bloomberg News, they have asked Governor Rick Scott to downplay Florida's job gains.  Because it only helps Obama to paint a rosy picture.  (Presently In His Blue Period)

But for some reason, Governor Scott won't say Florida sucks.  (Maybe He's Never Been There)  Because just hours after that Bloomberg report, the Florida Republican Party released a memo saying, "Florida's unemployment rate dropped for the eleventh consecutive month and now sits at 8.6%.  That's the lowest it's been since December 2008."

Ix-nay on the oo-thousand-eight-tay.  At-thay uz-way esident-pray ush-bay.  (Stephen Thinks He's Speaking Latino)  (audience laughter)

Video and full transcript below the fold.

Now Nation, in the past few months, our economy has been as sluggish as a slug at a slug convention.  It's gotten so bad, I had to fire our metaphor writer.  Well folks, I've got some good news, and some bad news.  The good news is, there's plenty of bad news, which is great news for Mitt Romney.  You see, the cornerstone of Mitt's campaign is that he can fix Obama's broken economy.  So the worse things are for John Q. Public, the better they are for Willard M. Private.
BRET BAIER (6/20/2012): Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke said today unemployment will remain above 8% through the end of the year.

REP. KEVIN MCCARTHY, R-CA (6/21/2012): This is bad news.

STUART VARNEY (6/21/2012): More bad jobs news ... and a weak economy it is.

MELISSA FRANCIS (6/21/2012): The economy is not getting better.

Woo!  The economy is not getting better!

(Stephen starts dancing to "Celebration")

All right, Jimmy, that's enough.  That's enough, Jimmy.  People are hurting.  (smiles)

Unfortunately for Mitt Romney, not everything is coming up dead roses.  Some key swing states are actually rebounding, and the Republican governors of those states naturally want to look good.  And their reluctance to get on the gloom wagon brings us to tonight's Wørd: Silver Maligning.

Folks, one of the swing states, Florida, was devastated by the recession, but has recently rebounded, under the leadership of Republican Governor and grown-up Bat Boy Rick Scott,

who recently tooted his own horn with this ad.


NARRATOR: Across Florida, here's the news.  Companies are hiring, expanding, putting more Floridians to work.  Florida's unemployment rate continues to get better, now at a 3-year low. ... Florida's getting back to work.
Now, good for him.  But folks, here's the problem.  One pollster, when he saw that commercial, said, "I initially thought it was an Obama ad."  And many elderly Florida voters are already easily confused.  'Cause you know what else they think are ads for Obama?  These.

Well, the Romney campaign knew they had to do something.  (Horse Dancing!)  Now, according to Bloomberg News, they have asked Governor Rick Scott to downplay Florida's job gains.  Because it only helps Obama to paint a rosy picture.  (Presently In His Blue Period)

But for some reason, Governor Scott won't say Florida sucks.  (Maybe He's Never Been There)  Because just hours after that Bloomberg report, the Florida Republican Party released a memo saying, "Florida's unemployment rate dropped for the eleventh consecutive month and now sits at 8.6%.  That's the lowest it's been since December 2008."

Ix-nay on the oo-thousand-eight-tay.  At-thay uz-way esident-pray ush-bay.  (Stephen Thinks He's Speaking Latino)  (audience laughter)

Now folks, it is so important that we conservatives all sing from the same hymnal.  (Battle Hymn of the Republicans)  I mean, everybody.  I mean, just look at this destructively upbeat clip on Fox News.

STEVE DOOCY: 80s across the Central Plains, 60s up north, it's going to be a beautiful day.
Noooo!!!!  That's Obama's beautiful day!  Remember, it's not partly sunny, it's party cancerous, with a chance of your wife leaving you for Ramon, the pool boy.  (According To The Diddler 5000)

And even if there is good news, we've got to spin it in the worst possible light for the President.  (Compact Fluorescent?)  For instance, in those few states that have added jobs, just focus on what a drag it is to have to go to work every day.  "Hey, let's go out and party.  Oh wait, I have to go to work tomorrow.  Thanks a lot, Obama!"  (Buzz Killed By Drone)

Now folks, I believe to get this country back on track, we have to drag everyone down in the dumps.  And I'm ready to do my part.

Great news from the Woodland Park Zoo in Seattle, Washington.  Due to a heart defect, a rare baby snow leopard has been euthanized.  He was so young, he didn't even have a name.  Romney 2012!

(audience applause)

Because the only way that Mitt can win is to remember the old saying: If it ain't broke, insist that it is, and maybe they'll hire you to fix it.  (Silver Maligning)  And that's the Wørd.  We'll be right back.

Stephen also talked about the impending Supreme Court decision on Obamacare, and on Richard Mourdock's multiple video responses to the different possible rulings.
He then looked at how more teens are taking drugs to help them study.

Meanwhile, Jon looked at the winners and losers in the Arizona immigration law decision, and on Obama and Romney's attempts at wooing the Latino vote.  Guess who does a clumsier job.

He then looked at the Romney retreat of ultra-rich donors in Utah last week.
Stephen interviewed sportswriter Frank Deford, and Jon finally got around to interviewing Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FL), which of course went long.  Here's the whole unedited interview in THREE parts.  The whole thing runs well over half an hour!  Jon really goes after Rubio over Senate Republicans filibustering almost every damn thing.
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

Originally posted to BruinKid on Tue Jun 26, 2012 at 05:00 AM PDT.

Also republished by DKOMA and Electronic America: Progressives Film, music & Arts Group.

EMAIL TO A FRIEND X
Your Email has been sent.
You must add at least one tag to this diary before publishing it.

Add keywords that describe this diary. Separate multiple keywords with commas.
Tagging tips - Search For Tags - Browse For Tags

?

More Tagging tips:

A tag is a way to search for this diary. If someone is searching for "Barack Obama," is this a diary they'd be trying to find?

Use a person's full name, without any title. Senator Obama may become President Obama, and Michelle Obama might run for office.

If your diary covers an election or elected official, use election tags, which are generally the state abbreviation followed by the office. CA-01 is the first district House seat. CA-Sen covers both senate races. NY-GOV covers the New York governor's race.

Tags do not compound: that is, "education reform" is a completely different tag from "education". A tag like "reform" alone is probably not meaningful.

Consider if one or more of these tags fits your diary: Civil Rights, Community, Congress, Culture, Economy, Education, Elections, Energy, Environment, Health Care, International, Labor, Law, Media, Meta, National Security, Science, Transportation, or White House. If your diary is specific to a state, consider adding the state (California, Texas, etc). Keep in mind, though, that there are many wonderful and important diaries that don't fit in any of these tags. Don't worry if yours doesn't.

You can add a private note to this diary when hotlisting it:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from your hotlist?
Are you sure you want to remove your recommendation? You can only recommend a diary once, so you will not be able to re-recommend it afterwards.
Rescue this diary, and add a note:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary from Rescue?
Choose where to republish this diary. The diary will be added to the queue for that group. Publish it from the queue to make it appear.

You must be a member of a group to use this feature.

Add a quick update to your diary without changing the diary itself:
Are you sure you want to remove this diary?
(The diary will be removed from the site and returned to your drafts for further editing.)
(The diary will be removed.)
Are you sure you want to save these changes to the published diary?

Comment Preferences

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

Click here for the mobile view of the site