Welcome to Part 6 of our series, The Unrav'ling Thread, where we explore the many strange, beautiful, and perplexing things that happen when you hit "publish" and launch your diary from the nest, hoping that it can fly, and that it won't be scooped up by a hungry raptor.
As we've discussed in
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four and
Part Five
the comment thread of your diary can be anything from a reflective fireside chat to the wild, wild West. Part of this depends on how you "manage" the comments; part of it depends on the sort of commenters who show up.
As we discussed in Part 3 there are quite a few "species" of commenters. Today, with some help from the wonderful commenters in Part 3 who added some critters to our menagerie, we will discuss some other frequently-spotted commenters. Feel free to add any others in the comments here.
Follow along below the watering hole for more.
Here are some of the commenters you might encounter, in addition to those you've already met in Part 3 of this series.
Pedantus maximus brought to us by zenbassoon who terms them:
"The Cliff Claven of the commenters, this person, while well meaning, will expound at great length about some of the minutest minutiae in the diary."
If you were sitting next to P. maximus at a bar, you might think about changing seats. On a plane? Well, you're in for a long flight. In your comment thread, you can leave this generally harmless but often irritating commenter to ramble on while you focus on those who can see the bigger picture.
Alreadyus beatchatuitus brought to us by blue aardvark who notes:
"I have learned to no longer be embarassed when I post a diary and some commenter says "Yes, I wrote about this the other day" and I click the link and find a Master's Thesis dissertation with embedded footnotes to 257 different relevant sources."
If you find this happening, don't rush to delete your diary. You can add an update with a link to the other diary. Chances are if your commenters liked your subject matter, this will be well received. The other diarist may also return the favor.
Deflectimus runoffimus, brought to us by Shaharazade, is a subspecies of Hijackus tangentialus:
"These commenter's are often illogical... Their intent is to both drive the diarist off and derail the comments so that those participating are guilty of endorsing whatever they have used to debunk the dairy. The comment thread become people fending off attacks that are totally illogical as well indefensible."
If you find you've been set upon by this pest, your best bet is to ignore their taunts and do your best to interact effectively with the commenters who are interested in your topic and your diary, and are willing to discuss it in good faith (whether or not they disagree).
Acarus grammaticus, brought to us by angry marmot:
"...is identified by the posting of single comments related to grammar, spelling or punctuation. While most often not malicious in intent, A. grammaticus can be a source of embarrassment. Or embarassment? Damnit!"
Stop the presses! A. grammaticus has found a typo on the Internet! At this very moment, they're typing a comment to point out that it's "erroneous", not "erroneus". As more of us type on an iPad or other gadget, the greater the likelihood of errors. One way to minimize errors is to type your text into Microsoft Word or other spell-check-equipped program and then copy and paste it into your diary or comment field. Still, whether it's you or one f your commenters who have made a spelling or grammar faux pas, this pesky critter is lurking nearby, ready to point it out.
Conspiratus hyperventilatus, brought to us by PsychoSavannah, is a curious creature who likes to
"...up the ante, so to speak, on the evils of republicans. I've seen threads where, by the time all is said and done, republicans and conservatives are boiling babies to keep power and are involved in every conspiracy in the world ON PURPOSE."
How can you respond to that? You can't. Best approach? Let them vent, because keeping these ideas in their fevered brains can't be healthy. If you try to engage them and talk them down off the ledge, they'll probably say that you're part of the conspiracy too.
Bloviatus expertus illegens, brought to us by angry marmot:
"There is a subspecies of Bloviatus expertus for whom the keyword in the title are sufficient to prompt "definitive" comment without, of course, having read the content of a diary. The appearance of Bloviatus expertus illegens is particularly trying"
Yes, you could reply: "Hey, did you even read my diary??!" but by the time you hit
"post", this annoying critter will probably be depositing their opinions onto someone else's diary. Unless they've said something egregious, feel free to ignore their hit-and-run remarks.
Lest you think that our commenter menagerie consists solely of detractors and distractors, keep in mind that we do have some folks here whose sole intent is [gasp!] to help you become a better diarist. Foremost among these is the always welcome...
Encouragus amiabilus brought to us by Polly Syllabic who reminds us that:
"They encourage and gently nudge others foward to explore and find their greater potentials. I like to think of those critters as 'favorite grandmas'. They're some of my favorites."
How do these marvelous commenters help? Beyond tipping and recommending, they post thoughtful comments, expanding on your points, posing thought-provoking questions, responding to the comments of others, suggesting areas for future diaries or further discussion. If E. amiabilus graces your diary with their presence, take this as an opportunity to learn, to grow, and to show your gratitude.
You might want to "follow" them and read their diaries and grace them with constructive comments. They might opt to follow you so they won't miss your future writing here. Make the most of these interactions.
Finally, while negative comments may discourage us or bring out emotions we'd rather not experience, always remember two things:
1. You cannot enlighten the unconscious
2. Never let negative people live rent-free in your head.
Feel free to bask in the warmth of your positive commenters. You deserve it.