I previously described my situation here: http://www.dailykos.com/...
In that, I had to divulge a bit of background in order to explain how my circumstances came about. As with most things in life, the devil is indeed in the details and unfortunately, without those details, my situation would seem otherwise incredible. As unusual as it may seem, it is nonetheless quite sadly and startlingly true.
For those who do not wish to peruse that lengthy account, the short version is this: I couldn't find work, made an attempt to start a business which fell through my grasp, and despite having had no income, was told that my inability to make full child support payments to my ex, who lives in a palace with the children, was 'willful'. Now I face a jail sentence of up to 6 months.
In short, I was told that I was poor on purpose. That's the problem we face. This nation has been brainwashed to believe that poverty is a 'choice' or a result of some critical or moral failure. As a nation, we've been led to believe that despite the poor economy, poverty is an individual problem.
Now I'm sure there are some incredulous readers that are saying 'now how is this possible?' or 'what's his real motivation'. Start by going to the above link and perusing the piece. If you still have questions, come back and comment and I'll be happy to answer them.
How court went last appearance: First, absolutely no mention was made of the objections I filed. The court did not even address them, despite the fact that they quite explicitly pointed out how the finding of a 'willful' violation was based on assumptions with no basis in fact. This decision was based on a perception, not the empirical reality, not the facts, and not the truth. This is in part because my court-appointed attorney spent a good deal of time 'shushing' me, and rather than relating my circumstances and relationship to my children, took a much more law-based approach at trial. Details were missing, so the judge made assumptions. My fault for, once again, ceding to what I'd hoped would be an effective approach in the hands of a professional. At the last hearing, we'd explained that payments were being made. I still have that job and have been told I will be made a manager sooner than later. Like I said: I'm pretty sure they got a bargain. Payments have been lower than the ordered amount, but the CS collection unit cannot legally take a greater percent of my pay even though I've asked them to. So the judge adjourned until today.
In a few minutes, I'm heading out the door with the kid who've been staying with me for the past week, to find out if I'm going to jail. They know more than I want them to, and I'm honestly torn over that. I think it is perhaps better that they know more for reasons I haven't time to get into here.
For me, part of me at least, I WANT to go to jail. I can handle it fine. I could escape the insanity of this horribly soul-wrenching struggle to keep a disintegrating life together. No bills, no repairs, just exercise, reflection, and managing a new, difficult, but ultimately simpler dynamic.
It would be a harsh but welcome vacation from which I could re-emerge and start over.
But there are 2 reasons I don't want to go: 1) My kids and I wouldn't see each-other. They're already upset that their mom told them I would be going and don't want to see it happen either. 2) I don't want them to grow up with a seed of despise for their mother from knowing she put their dad in jail. They know too much about the circumstances, and really can't understand what I've done wrong.
I have to get going here. Thanks to all of you who've sent good wishes.
Mine is not the only instance of this. It is happening all over the nation with different devices and for the same reason: We treat poverty as a choice rather than an affliction, and if we don't talk about it, we'll never solve it.
Peace.