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Ground control to Major Tom: NASA has no budget. Make your Tang supply last 5 more years.

Romney wants to fix the federal budget by cutting funding for PBS. I don't trust anyone who puts Wall Street before Sesame Street.

Romney and Ryan want to cut Medicaid, eliminate jobs and play a shitload of Hootie and the Blowfish.

Before you judge Mitt Romney by his wealth, try walking a mile in his backyard.

If religious people think it's ok to make laws forcing women to have babies, we should make mandatory abortions for religious people laws.

Billy Graham is in the hospital with an infection in his lungs... or maybe they're just gay and need to repent.

The iPhone has 2 million times the storage of the 1969 Apollo 11 spacecraft computer. They went to the moon. Now people throw birds at pigs.

It's really not that hard to cook a steak. I'll never understand how the people of Salisbury managed to screw it up so bad.

Originally posted to jbou on Wed Aug 15, 2012 at 12:11 PM PDT.

Also republished by DKOMA.

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