In a long expected move, the Republican House today passed the "Mulligan" bill. It now will go to the Senate, where it should be taken up by the National Media as the most pressing issue of our time.
The errors of the past year have been so egregious, and so onerous to those who are responsible for this country, that there must be an immediate intellectual bail-out.
As a result, it is imperative that this November 1st, every person in America sets their calendar back to November 11, 2011.
(Details on the flip.)
Although the large amount of bills passed by the House and Senate will need to be retroactively dated to 2011, that is a very simple "Find/Replace" function which can be performed by anyone.
This will give our military needed time to complete their narrowly defined and perfectly achievable goals.
The presidential election will be of course, reset to 2011, giving the Republican party the needed time to find a perfect candidate. Resetting the clock will also ensure that the Democratic party will have time to find THEIR perfect candidate, (Whaddya mean you LIKE the one you have?)
The reduction in cost for the entertainment industry will be also helpful, ensuring that only the best products will be put out in 2011, and those mega-bombs that failed miserably can be successfully written off as non-products.
The financial and health care industries will also benefit from the additional time to become compliant with "Obamacare". Not that it's going to actually go into effect, since we will also have an additional year to repeal it.
Yes, it's clear that the only reason that the senate would NOT take this up would be due to petty politicking, and attempts to manipulate the election.
It's clear that if this bill is not passed by the Senate and signed into law immediately, the entire fate of western civilization is at stake.
I mean, you Democrats don't want to have to deal with President Romney, do you? And heck, maybe one of the supreme court justices will change their mind and retire in 2011, thus giving you the chance to actually win...