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pen on paper: 'Dear diary'
 
Hello, human diary. It is I again, Mitt Romney, your better.

My only substantive obligation today was appearing at a rally to demonstrate how much women approve of me. We acquired a decent number of women for the event, easily two dozen or so, which should be sufficient to prove the point. I then spoke to them about women things, such as the woman entrepreneur I once met. She started an upholstery business—I believe I have mentioned her before. Then I spoke at length about foreign policy again, since my foreign policy ideas seem to be especially popular of late.

I have not yet heard back from the staffer who promised to provide me a copy of Clint Eastwood's speech endorsing me. Come to think of it, I have not seen him since he agreed to fetch me the tape.

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